Evil Eva Reviews... Attachments

EvilEva Reviews ...... Attachments by Rainbow Rowell.

Dissecting The Cover:

I'm totally digging this cover!

I like that it's simple. I like the double meaning of the title. I like that it's cute without being cutesy.

To me, this cover says "Why, yes, I am a serious reader but with a touch of whimsy. Now hop on my unicorn as I adjust my monocle and straighten my cardigan sweater and we'll be off to Narnia tout suite!"

Let's Review:

Lincoln O' Neill has a pretty boss job title at The Courier: Internet security officer. It sounds fairly bad ass, like he'll be in charge of thwarting hackers and building impenetrable firewalls. Like James Bond on desk duty!

That's pretty far off from what his job actually entails, which is reading other people's emails. He's basically a glorified eavesdropper.

Which isn't exactly what he signed up for.
But there is one bright side to his moral dilemma. Lincoln becomes thoroughly entertained by the correspondence of two of his coworkers.
Beth Fremont and Jennifer Scribner-Snyder spend endless amounts of company time spilling the intimate details of their lives and loves; from weddings and weight gain, to boyfriend and baby trouble.

Lincoln knows it's his duty to turn them in. But he just can't bring himself to do it. He also can't bring himself to stop reading their emails.

Which could be a problem. Because Lincoln is fairly certain that he's falling for Beth.
So the big question is this: How do you formally introduce yourself to someone whom you've been technically kinda, sorta semi-spying on for months? 

And the bigger question? How do you declare your love to someone that doesn't technically kinda, sorta semi-know who you are?

Here's What I Think:

Attachments came along at the perfect time for me in by book-reading schedule. I had just finished Matched and was super psyched to start Requiem which would be out... in TWO WEEKS!

I don't know about y'all, but I can't go two whole weeks without reading SOMETHING.

I was in quite the quandary. I didn't want to start Crossed (the next book in Ally Condie's trilogy) just yet. I needed something light and fun to break up the dystopia of it all.

And along came Attachments. It was the perfect chick-lit book with just the right mix of wit, drama, swoon, and fun! 
The story is told two different ways, alternating chapter by chapter between Lincoln's more traditional third person telling and Beth and Jennifer's emails. 
Lincoln is the primary protagonist though. We get to know more about him because we're basically in his head. And what we learn is that Lincoln is pretty much the quintessential nice guy.
He's kind and caring and a little shy. He lives with his mom. Befriends Doris the vending machine lady. Plays Dungeons and Dragons with his friends on the weekends. Takes his nephews to the movies. Goes to his sister for advice. 
But it also means his last girlfriend totally broke his heart. He's not skilled in the art of flirting. He can't hold his liquor. And he's slightly awkward socially. 
But you still root for him. You want him to succeed. You want him to get the girl. You hope that phrase "nice guys finish last" doesn't apply to him. He's just a lovable character.
As are Beth and Jennifer! Their emails are hilarious, revealing, sad, inappropriate, honest, random, and sweet. And even though, because of this format, we only get a few pages of their interactions at a time, they never feel like secondary characters. We learn all about their lives: the good, the bad and the ugly and it's all done with a sense of humor that can only exist between two best friends.
And while I loved the book as a whole, their conversations were my favorite parts. Maybe because they reminded me of myself and Bestie J!
I guess what I'm trying to say is, their friendship actually felt real.
Not like Jennifer merely existed for Beth to have someone to squeal with over her Cute Guy. (Not to say they don't squeal over cute guys. They do!)
I just hate it when the best friend role isn't fleshed out and it seems like homegirl's sole purpose is to drift into scenes, wholeheartedly agree with our heroine, and fade right back out. I like my besties with some personality!
So I really appreciated that Rainbow Rowell gave Jennifer her own story separate from the story she shared with Beth.
Ok, so I've told you about my love for Lincoln, Beth, and Jennifer, but, truth be told, Attachments is a veritable cornucopia of great characters!
There's Lincoln's well-meaning mother who can't let him grow up. His frazzled sister that desperately wants him to.
The saucy and sage Doris.
Christine, Dave, and the rest of the ragtag band of misfits that make up Lincoln's D and D group.
The hard-partying, smooth-talking, occasionally douchey but ultimately redeemable, Justin.
Beth's irritatingly cool rocker boyfriend, Chris. And Jennifer's sweet if often times oblivious husband, Mitch.
Basically, Rainbow Rowell is a genius when it comes to creating characters that are both lovable and flawed. She's also fairly masterful when it comes to building a hilarious story out of a seemingly simple concept.
I mean, sure, Attachments is a zippy, light, little read about office romance.
But we NEED zippy, light, little reads! They give us a much needed break from all the heavy, intense seriousness provided by our various dystopian, murder mystery, psychological thriller, vampire/werewolf love triangles.
So, if your book-reading schedule has recently been slammed with heavy-duty reads, might I suggest you take a walk on the zippy, light side with an awkwardly awesome guy and his love for a girl he's only read about!

Swoony Times:

You may be wondering how a book can have such a high swoon-quotient when the two main characters don't even meet until the very end.
Well the answer is simple. I have no idea.
But Rainbow Rowell does! In fact, she's kinda mastered the shizz.
You can practically FEEL the tension between these characters! From Lincoln's unrequited lust to Beth's experimental longing. It's a sweet, will-they-won't-they, intense tummy-knotter that keeps you desperately turning the pages til the very end.

Bonus Shizz:

Reading Emails!
TRUTH SERUM TIME: I think I might be a bit of a voyeur, y'all. I totally look in people's windows when I'm driving at night if their blinds are open and their lights are on. And I wonder what they're doing and if they're watching something on TV that I like. Or I think "Hmm. A burgundy living room wall? That's pretty bold. I don't know if I could live with that. It's a little distracting."
I mean, I'm not so bad that I snoop in people's medicine cabinets. I mean, we all have some kind of diarrhea medicine in our bathrooms. After all, everyone poops. So what do I care what brand you use? Answer: I don't.
I will however ALWAYS that a gander at your bookshelves. And I'll totally silently judge you if you don't even have a bookshelf. (I mean, what is that about!?!?)
Anyhoozle, the point of that tangent wasn't to frighten you into never inviting me over to your home, I was just trying to explain why I find it so fun reading other people's emails. Because I'm evidently a really fucked up individual.
I mean, it's not like I read other people's emails in real life. That's an invasion of privacy. But I do like when books are written in this format. I feel like we get to know the characters in a different, maybe more authentic way. Plus it makes for a quick read!

Author Stalker Status!
I realize that I'm kinda just gushing at this point in the review but I can't help it, you guys. I LOVED this book! I LOVED the characters! I LOVED the idea! And I LOVED Rainbow Rowell's writing style! So much so that I immediately went out and purchased Eleanor & Park. And then made a note to remind myself that Rainbow's next book (titled Fangirl!) (sqeeeeeee!) will be coming to bookstores September 10th!

Noteworthy:

From page 137:

"There's never been a moment," he barely said, "when I didn't recognize you."
She wiped her eyes. Her mascara smeared. He nudged the merry-go-round into motion. He could kiss her now. If he wanted.
"I'd know you in the dark," he said. "From a thousand miles away. There's nothing you could become that I haven't already fallen in love with.

Hear that? That's the sound of me swooning! This is why nerd boys are the absolute best!

From page 318:

She laughed. It was better than he could have imagined. Like a giggle falling off its chair.

I just love that line!

Mix Tape:

Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepsen!




If You Liked That, Try This:

The Boy Next Door by Meg Cabot.

The Scale Of Judgment Says:

...... 4.

This book will make you 1.) literally laugh out loud 2.) want to call up your best friend and 3.)  hope that an adorably awkward guy is reading your emails and dreaming of the day he'll get up the courage to talk to you.   

******

Music from Grooveshark.

EvilEva Reviews... Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children

EvilEva reviews...... Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs.

 

When Jacob was little, his grandfather would tell him fantastical stories of some very peculiar children. Children that could lift boulders over their heads, make fire using only their hands and float effortlessly through the air, among other unbelievable talents.  These children lived in a large house on a tiny island with an odd headmistress named Miss Peregrine.
As a child, Jacob believed his grandfather's tall tales and loved looking through his strange collection of photographs.
Now a teenager, Jacob is afraid his grandfather is losing his mind and that all those stories of his past were nothing but lies.
Then his grandfather is brutally murdered. And with his dying breath he tells Jacob to go to the island to find the truth. So Jacob journeys to the mysterious island in search of Miss Peregrine and the answers to his grandfather's greatest secrets.
He finds that not only were the peculiar children real but they're still alive and they need his help. Because something dark and sinister is after them. And only Jacob can see it.

I am completely cover slutty over this book! I mean, just look at it! It's creepy, yet intriguing. There's an old timey gal levitating, for God's sake! And it's not the only creeptastic pic, the book is littered with them. Normally I wouldn't like that kind of thing as it strikes me as being too gimmicky but for this book it worked. The pictures help tell the story.

I gotta say, I had kind of a mixed bag o' feelings for this book. The beginning I liked. I thought the imagery was solid and the descriptions were beautifully written. Around the middle i felt like the story started lagging a little. Like we were headed somewhere, we took one wrong turn and suddenly it's like "Wait. Where the fuck are we? What the fuck is a loop? Who are all these ymbrynes? What is a ymbryne? Aaaaah get me outta here!" But towards the end we got back on the right path, the story sorted itself out and it felt less disjointed.

I liked that the subject matter was a little different for YA. I think the peculiar children are a refreshing change from all the vampires, werewolves, angels, zombies and other assorted supernatural peeps that have invaded the shelves for the past few years.
The baddies in this book are truly terrifying. Bonus points to Mr. Ransom for giving some nightmare-inducing descriptions.
The characters were great too. Some were stronger than others. Jacob, Emma, Bronwyn, Enoch, and Millard were standouts. A few of the characters weren't as fleshed out as the others. I would've liked to read more of Olive, the amazing levitating girl. I felt like the author created too many characters to keep up with. So some got lost in the shuffle.

So. I liked this book but I feel like I could have loved it.
But this is only Ransom Riggs' first novel and I think that he has what it takes to make an even better sequel. There's room for Miss Peregrine and her peculiar children to grow. And the ending of this book could very easily set up his next.

The Scale of Judgment says...... 3 and a half.

The TBR Back Burner Challenge: Round 3 Reviews

There was really no rhyme or reason in picking this months TBR selection. Previously I went strictly chick-lit and after that strictly YA. This month I decided how bout a little of both. So here we go.

EvilEva reviews...... Unpredictable by Eileen Cook.

Sophie has given Doug six years of her life. Doug has given Sophie the boot. However, Sophie will not give up that easily. Or rather Sophie will not be given up that easily. She plans on getting Doug back by any means necessary. Whether she has to steal his socks, move his car or pose as a psychic in order to trick his new girlfriend into breaking up with him.

With a little help from professional skeptic Nick, Sophie hones her faux psychic skills and becomes a little too convincing.
Now she's being offered a gig at a radio station and shortly thereafter Doug comes waltzing back into her life. But is this really what Sophie wanted? Or is she destined for something more?

I loved this book! The premise is deliciously ridiculous and yet sheer genius.
When someone breaks your heart you shouldn't waste your time wallowing. Oh no. You should use those precious moments to go and steal all the matches to his socks from the laundry room of his new apartment! You should take the spare keys and move his car a few parking spaces down from where he originally parked it! All in an attempt to drive him crazy and realize how much he needs you! I could seriously imagine some women "getting ideas" after reading this book.

As a main character, Sophie is super likable and totes hilarious! There were several parts when I literally laughed out loud. She is just so spunky and madcap! She would be the girl to accompany you on an ex-drive by, no questions asked. She would call your ex for you, pretending to be a wrong number, to see if a woman answers. She's zany but she means well. I didn't really get why she was pining so hard for Doug though. He was a total douchenugget. He was so self centered. I just kept thinking "Sophie! Girl, open your eyes! He is NOT worth it. And it is so very obvious that Nick is totally into you."
I liked Nick. I wasn't in complete swoony-swoon mode though because he had an odd way of phrasing things that sometimes made me think "Are there really any guys that talk like this? I've never met one if this particular breed does in fact exist." But he was really sweet and I loved that he was nerdy. Because I heart nerds!

I wish there was a little more hanky panky going on because I do like a certain amount of sexy times in my lady literature.
But Eileen Cook more than made up for the no boot-knocking with all the silliness and the misadventures of Sophie. I really liked her writing style. It reminded me a lot of Meg Cabot's.
So if you're into the Cabot you'll probably enjoy the Cook.
And good news, I just discovered that Eileen Cook has three YA books out! So, even more TBR! I'll definitely have to check those out.

The Scale of Judgment says...... 4.

EvilEva reviews...... You Wish by Mandy Hubbard.

Kayla is seriously NOT looking forward to her sixteenth birthday party. A party, btw, that she didn't want in the first place. But her mother throws a big bash anyway complete with party guests Kayla doesn't even know and an obnoxious four-tiered pink monstrosity of a cake. Kayla is upset by all this bullshizz, so she decides to make a wish on that hideous cake. She wishes that all of her birthday wishes came true.
And that's when Kayla's troubles begin.

The next morning, she's suddenly the not-so-proud owner of a life-sized My Little Pony. The next day her room is covered in gumballs. Then she finds a weird, red-headed girl that looks suspiciously like her old Raggedy Ann doll, alive and sprawled out on the floor of her closet. Then an overly-tan, overly-muscled, semi-plasticy boy named Ken starts following her around.
Kayla's wishes from birthdays past are coming true!

She has to stop these wishes. Because, A.) so far they have all been completely ridiculous and are ruining her life! And B.) last year she wished that her crush, Ben would kiss her. But this year Ben is her best friend's boyfriend! 

I think the premise of this book is hilarious. A My Little Pony, a Raggedy Ann doll and a Ken doll coming to life and invading your teenage world in which you no longer care about any of them, is pretty funny.
And Kayla is a decent protagonist being so super mortified by all of these childish wishes and then also forced to deal with them. 

I wish the author had taken a little more time with the story though. There were parts that I felt were a little rushed. It was like all these other little moments were there for nothing more than filler until the next wish was revealed. I also thought that the author was a little too pop culture-y for pop cultures sake. Kinda like, none of this really has anything to do with the story and in no way moves the story along but here's a random mention of Miley Cyrus and Chuck E. Cheese and Twilight. 

And if I had to read about Kayla's Converse ONE MORE TIME! Ugh! We get it. You're cool and alternative and nobody understands you but can you shut the fuck up about your shoes already! Don't get me wrong, I love Converse but I don't love being beaten over the head with them, physically or metaphorically. 

I thought the book was good for what it was, a light, fluffy, chick-litty, YA novel.
I'm a little cover slutty over it, I must admit. I like that it's plain and simple while still conveying the meaning of the story. I like how the words "You Wish" look like smoke coming from the pony candle. I thought that was pretty clever. Plus, I loves cupcakes!

The Scale of Judgment says......3.

EvilEva reviews... Zombies vs. Unicorns

EvilEva reviews...... Zombies vs. Unicorns by Holly Black and Justine Larbalestier. 

Zombies vs. Unicorns is an anthology arguing the merits of zombies over unicorns and vice versa by some of today's hottest YA authors. 

Joining Justine Larbalestier on Team Zombie are:

*Libba Bray
*Cassandra Clare
*Alaya Dawn Johnson
*Maureen Johnson
*Carrie Ryan
*Scott Westerfeld

And siding with Holly Black for Team Unicorn are:

*Meg Cabot
*Kathleen Duey
*Margo Lanagan
*Garth Nix
*Naomi Novik
*Diana Peterfreund

The book jacket asks: Are you Team Zombie or Team Unicorn? And truthfully, after reading all 12 stories I'm no closer to answering that question than when I started the book. I will try to look at this logically though. So based on the following criteria, I will be able to give you my answer by the end of this review.

First: Who had the better stories? 
My favorite was "Love Will Tear Us Apart" by Alaya Dawn Johnson. A lovely story about a gay zombie obsessed with music, mac and cheese, and a certain lacrosse player.
I also liked Cassandra Clare's story "Cold Hands," "Bougainvillea" by Carrie Ryan, and Maureen Johnson's "The Children of the Revolution." 
And of course I liked Meg Cabot's contribution "Princess Prettypants," as well as Diana Peterfreund's "The Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn." 
So that's four zombie stories to a mere two unicorns. 
Advantage: Zombie.

Second, for all of you that are like me, complete cover sluts!, lets dissect the cover now, shall we?
I heart this cover! It's like Where's Waldo for the deeply disturbed! I think the unicorns come off a little bit better than the zombies here. The unicorns look like a united front, all working together to rid the world of the zombies. The zombies look less organized. There's one here. There's one there. On the front of the book, a zombie even seems to be attacking another zombie. It's sheer zombie madness out there!
So I'm gonna have to give this round to Team Unicorn.

Third, who would win in an arm wrestling match?
Well, unicorns don't have arms and zombies limbs fall off so willy-nilly. I don't think either would stand a chance winning at arm wrestling.
Therefore, point goes to no one.

Well dammit. After three rounds of thought provoking questions, it's tied 1 to 1.
You know what that means, right? 

The winner is.............. A Zombie Unicorn!

Now. About that cover.
See if you can find...

*A zombie skating on unicorn horns
*A discarded dagger
*2 purse-carrying zombies
*5 skeletons
*2 beheaded unicorns
*3 blue brains
*2 pink hats
*A turtle
*A pair of eyeglasses
*And 2 weird bird-headed people (Yeah. You read me right. Bird-headed people! Take a look if you don't believe me. Bird-Headed People! Hey, maybe that is the answer to this great debate. Zombies or Unicorns? Neither. Team Bird-Headed People!)

The Scale of Judgment says...... 3.

EvilEva reviews... The Replacement

EvilEva reviews...... The Replacement by Brenna Yovanoff. 

Mackie Doyle isn't your average teenager. He's not a real teenager at all. He's a Replacement. Literally plucked from the bottom of the heap to take the place of a real baby in the real world. But with allergies to blood, iron and consecrated ground, Mackie has a hard enough time fitting in. Now add to that a pissed off girl named Tate hounding him to help her find her baby sister and his recent discovery of an underground world full of ugly things from which he hails, and Mackie's life goes from complicated to even more so. Now time is running out. Tate's sister will be sacrificed for the good of the town. And Mackie may be the only one able to stop it.

Ok, i'm gonna start off by saying DAMMIT! I really wanted to like this book. I mean, just look at the cover! But I guess that's why you're not supposed to judge books by them. Because, as it turns out, I didn't like this one.
I felt like, as the designated "hero" of the story, Mackie was never very heroic. He kinda wallowed in self pity throughout the entire book. I mean, I get that he's the odd duck and that's what the story is about but I found myself being drawn more to Tate and Roswell. I think the book would've been much more interesting from either of their perspectives. I just didn't really connect with Mackie's voice.
There were certain parts too that I didn't get. Like at one point, Mackie is concerned about Tate's sister and her impending murder and how he should really try and stop it and then he's flirting with school hottie Alice, asking her to be his date to a party to make Tate jealous. It's like, HELLO!, a baby's life is at stake here! I think Jaeger bombs and copping a feel can probably take a backseat to the more pressing matters at hand, don't you?
Plus there were a few throwaway plot lines. His mother and her whole deal. Mackie having to play bass for Rasputin Sings the Blues. Alice's role in the story at all. I felt like all of these were introduced and then quickly pushed aside. That really bugged me. 
I did like the descriptions of the House of Mayhem and its many uglies though. It was very Tim Burton-esque. And I wish the Morrigan, Carlina and Luther had gotten more page time. Basically if the book had been less about Mackie and more about everyone else I might have liked it more. That's kind of a weird statement to make about the protagonist but that's my opinion. 
I thought the pacing was too slow &, more often than not, the story meandered. It never really held my interest. 
I do think there's a fan base for it though because I've seen some positive reviews throughout the blogosphere. Just not here. 


The Scale of Judgment says...... 2 and a half.