How To Fangirl: How To Be The Halloween Hostess With The Mostess

Welcome to the first ever How To Fangirl!
i'm soooooo excited and not just because it's my inaugural post but because the focus of said post is HALLOWEEN!!! Which is my all-time fave holiday! And i want to make it your all-time fave holiday too! So let's throw an amazing, spooktacular Halloween party--- fangirl-style!  

First, we must begin at the beginning...

Invitations:

They may seem like mere sheets of paper filled out for the sole purpose of mailing to friends and family to read, comprehend and promptly throw away but invitations are much more than that.
Invitations are the first impression to your party. They set the tone for what your guests can expect from you as a hostess.
i.e. awesome invitation= awesome party i'd love to attend.
      bad, half-assed invitation= bad, half-assed party i'll feign illness to avoid.
Trust me, you don't want that second one, pal.
So, Step 1 is to find stationery that fits the theme of your party. Step 2, come up with something clever to write. Can't come up with something clever? Google that shizz!
Because people on the Internet are smarter than you!
Don't feel bad, they're smarter than me too. In fact...
Confession Time: i, ahem, borrowed a few phrases from various invites i found online to make my own invitations.
And speaking of my invitations, take a look:

Nice, right?

Fangirl Pro Tip #59:
When making invitations via the computer, play with different fonts and colors until you find something you really like.
If you're filling out invitations the old-fashioned way (that's with a card and a pen, kids) then try using a colored gel pen instead of a boring old Bic. i like using silver for Halloween. It instantly adds a little pizazz. And who doesn't like pizazz?

Finally, since it is Halloween, i like to add a little something extra. So after folding up the invitation, i sprinkled in a bit of Halloween confetti. Think of it as a little "trick" before the "treat" that is your party!

Note From The Fangirl:
Kids LOVE this fun surprise. Adults? Not so much. A piece of the spider confetti fell out on my cousin's shoe and she nearly peed in her pants. But it's Halloween! You get a pass on all your trickery, right?

You want to mail out your invitations 2 weeks before your party (maybe even sooner if you have out of town guests or if you've tacked on an RSVP.)
i suggest telling your guests about your party months in advance, whether by phone, email or in person. Just to give them a little heads up. Especially if you want them to dress up. This gives them enough time to come up with a costume idea and make it happen.

Now that the invitations are sent, let's move on to the fun stuff.

Decorations:

These are very important for the success of any party. A good use of decorations can transform any space from ordinary to extraordinary! 
And we're in luck because Halloween is quite possibly THE BEST holiday for decorating! There are sooooo many possibilities. You can make your own haunted house, go for a witchy theme, or pull inspiration from any number of horror movie classics. Or you can combine all that shizz together for a smorgasbord of Halloweeny goodness. i personally like to go for the combo because there are too many a-mah-zing Halloween themes that i really like and i refuse to Sophie's Choice it.
So before i show you my Halloween party monster mash-up (see what i did there?), here are a few Fangirl Pro Tips especially for decorating:

Fangirl Decorating Pro Tip #1:
Start early.
Party planning may seem like all fun and games, but it's actually really hard work. So you'll want to start the process as soon as humanly possible. Those toilets aren't gonna clean themselves.  

Fangirl Decorating Pro Tip #2:
Take advantage of what you've already got.
Because with party planning, much like with life, the best things are FREE. So search your house high and low for anything that'll fit your theme. Search the homes of your non-greedy friends and family too. You never know who might have some creepy shizz in their attic that they don't mind you borrowing. 
Example:

i already own a Ouija board and a Tarot deck (doesn't everyone) so i used them and the Tarot deck guide book, plus my Dictionary of Superstition book for decoration. 

Another Example:

This is my evil old lady picture. i bought her on sale AFTER Halloween a few years ago. She's a hologram so depending on where you stand she's either a kind, grandmotherly-looking gal or a horrible monster. It's motion-censored too so when you walk by it her eyes glow red and she gives you her spiel about how she's trapped and it's so dark and she's so cold.
i also used various bottles and jars. And that with the skull in it is a cheese thing. What are they called? Not a cheese tray, really. More like a cheese dome? Is there such a thing as a cheese dome? 100 points to any Gryffindor that can tell me what the hell that thing is. Anyhoosies, the point is it's a regular kitchen item but when you add a skull, a spider and some moss it becomes spooktacular! Use what ya got, peeps! 
   
Fangirl Decorating Pro Tip #3:
Think outside of the box.
Sure, some things are obvious: "Oh, i'll totally carve a pumpkin! That's sooooo Halloween!" But try looking at things more creatively. Simple glass bottles can be transformed into potions just by adding colored water. Skim your shelves for books with a Halloweeny look to them or make some creeptacular book covers and change Lola and the Boy Next Door to The Book of Shadows! Then you can just put your books out on a coffee table or side table for an instant, easy, witchy look.  

Fangirl Decorating Pro Tip #4:
Any store with the word "Dollar" in it, is your friend.

Now, here's a look at my party pics with info on how you can steal the look and make it your own!

Makeshift Graveyard:
The makeshift graveyard is one of my faves. It's atmospheric and creepy, sure, but it's also cheap and easy! You can purchase these headstones from pretty much anywhere. i got mine from the Dollar Tree! Because why pay $10 when you can pay $1!
Most people set these bad boys up in their front yards. That's totally fine. But i like to make a fake cemetery in my backyard because you can see it from the window in my dining room which is where the food is, thus where most of my guests congregate.
To make my graveyard even creepier, i borrowed some angel statuary from my mom and added tealights in front of the headstones so they would be illuminated.

Add a sign for a lil' something extra. You can find these pretty much anywhere too. 
If you wanna get super fangirly though, you can always make your own. All it takes is styrofoam, spray paint and a little imagination!

Spooky Shrubbery:
i totally stole this idea because i'm a sneaky little thief with very loose morals. Pinterest is basically my crime den. Anyhoo, this is super simple. And, once again, CHEAP! All you need is paper towel or toilet paper rolls (which i'm assuming (and hoping) you've already got) and some glow sticks (hit up the Dollar Tree, y'all!) i would suggest that you get the stubby little fat sticks as opposed to the thinner ones. Oh and you also need some tape (i used packing tape.) 
All you have to do is save up your paper towel or toilet paper rolls, cup out various eye hole patterns in them (i used an exacto knife for this part. it's much easier than using scissors but it's also much more dangerous. so BE CAREFUL.) then on the day of your party (you'll need to do this particular decoration about an hour or 30 minutes before your party because the glow sticks won't keep their glow for more than about 5 hours and you want your spooky eyes to be their most vibrant when your guests start to arrive) snap your glow sticks like the package instructs you to do, then tape them on the inside of your tp rolls with your packing tape. The last step is placing them throughout your hedges for a creepy, your-being-watched feel.  

Bloody Bathroom:
This is the first year that i've brought the nightmarish fun to my bathroom! i don't know why it's taken me so long. i mean, the bathroom is part of the party so why should the ambiance stop in the hallway? Answer: it shouldn't. So since this year would be my first year, i decided to go all out. i went for a Psycho/Dexter/Mad Scientist's Medicine Cabinet vibe. i'm most proud of my shower curtain!

Pretty awesome, huh? Well, you can make it too! And for under $5!!!
Add these items to your Dollar Tree shopping list: 1 plain white shower curtain liner. 1 plain black plastic tablecloth. You'll also need a clear plastic shower curtain which my Dollar Tree did not carry but i bought one at Wal-Mart for a dollar and some change. You'll also need double-sided tape or glue and some red craft paint.
To achieve this sick look all you have to do is tape the black tablecloth to a wall, have a friend pose in front of it wielding a knife, then shine light on the tablecloth in order to create a silhouette of your friend, take a white gel pen or a piece of chalk and outline your friend's body. Then all you have to do is cut it out and either use double-sided tape (that's what i did) or glue to adhere the silhouette to the white shower curtain liner. Now use your red paint to make bloody handprints, blood splatter, splotches, and slashes. Let it dry completely. Then hang the liner with the silhouette and place the clear plastic shower curtain over it and voila! Bloody mess of a shower curtain!
The bathmat below it is also one of my creations. You can make that one too. Also for under $5! i found a cheap bathmat at Wal-Mart for around $3. The mat and red paint is all you need for this one. All you have to do is paint the bottoms of your feet and step on the mat. Then just add some drips and drops of paint, let it dry and bam! You're done.
To complete my gory bathroom look, i made over my medicine cabinet using different sized bottles and adding Halloween labels that i found at a craft store. i finished it off with a few creepy touches like fake crows, a glittery skull and spider, and some bloody gel clings.

i stuck a few bloody clings to my mirror for good measure too. And i added a skeleton rubber duckie for a touch of whimsy.

Then i threw in a little jokey touch.

Get it? It's a hand towel!

Ok, now that i've shown you how to decorate your yard and your bathroom, let's get on to the main event! i'm, of course, talking about whatever room you plan on having your party in. For me it's the living room/dining room.

Photo Op:
i positioned a photo op area so the first thing my guests can do is get their pic taken in front of a cool backdrop. i got two wall murals (from the Dollar Tree, natch) and taped them side-by-side.

i think, as the hostess with the mostess, that a nice thing to do is take pictures of all your guests in their costumes as soon as they arrive. Then later you can upload the pics, find a website that offers free borders, choose one that correlates with your theme and then print out specially-made pics to send to your friends and family along with your thank you notes (more on those in a minute.)
Another good idea is to purchase a small laundry basket (they sell some at the Dollar Tree!) and fill it with costume bits. What are "costume bits," you ask? Costume bits are bits of costumes that can be worn by the dreaded non-participators. So, for example, you could throw in some glasses with a fake nose, or giant clown sunglasses, or a sombrero, or various masks, or a firefighter hat, police badges, really anything that could be worn as a costume in a pinch. (P.S. all the items i just referred to can be found... you guessed it!... at the Dollar Tree! For a dollar!)
You can print out a sign to tie to the basket with something like "you have no excuse" written on it. (Can you tell that i abhor people that don't dress up?)

Pick Your Poison:
In the last few years, stores have started selling drink labels with fun, Halloween-type names on them. i highly suggest picking up a pack or two of these. This way you can dress up your drinks and actually use them as part of your decor as opposed to hiding them in the kitchen with the giant trash bag. 

You can also print out a "Pick Your Poison" sign. Just add a little glitter because everything looks better with a little glitter and pop it in a frame. Done!
And don't forget to jazz up your ice situation. Yet another thing that can look blah if you don't do your fangirl best.
i decided to go a little, um, dark with this one. i got an ice chest, covered it in caution tape (Dollar Tree! Holla!), then i poured in the ice and added fake body parts to top it off (also a Dollar Tree find.) It's good because not only does my ice station look completely amazeballs but it's also fully functioning! Just grab a cup and scoop you some ice!  

Lastly, let's decorate the table!
You'll want your treats to be the main focus of the table so i suggest doing minimal decorating there. Just use some cute tableware, like a plastic cauldron or a child's trick or treat bucket for chips and crackers and silver platters for veggies, cheese cubes, and dip. And definitely get a Halloween tablecloth or a piece of Halloween fabric to drape over your tabletop for an instant table makeover. Add a few taper candles (i used black but you could also rock orange, purple, green or blood red) and, of course, your food and then your done.    

Speaking of food, let's discuss that, shall we?

Food:

Another important part of any party. i mean, a girl's gotta eat, right?
For Halloween parties i like to think it's all about the sugar! i mean, Halloween is a holiday in which you gorge yourself on candy NOT vegetables. So i like baking cookies and cupcakes and putting out sweets.
But you also have to realize that your party isn't just about you. So, as not to seem selfish,  i added some chips and dip, some peanuts and pretzels and some veggies for those weirdos that expect there to be carrots at a Halloween party. 
Now i'll let you in on a little secret. Something you may not know about Evil Eva: she's a gourmet chef. This is, in fact, a complete and utter lie.
However, bitch can make a mean grilled cheese.
Anyway, there's really only one thing that i can make (other than grilled cheese) and that is desserts. Which is great for my taste buds but pretty shitty for my health. But i digress.
i will now teach you how to make something so super easy that you don't even have to know how to turn your oven on in order to make it! It's my super easy Halloweeny treat mix! Huzzah!

Evil Eva's Super Easy Halloweeny Treat Mix:
First you take a box of Crunch n Munch (or you can substitute Cracker Jacks, Fiddle Faddle, or some other ridiculously named popcorny treat) and pour the whole box into a large bowl. Then you add some pretzel sticks to the bowl. Next you take a bag of festive fall-colored M & M's and dump about half the bag in. Then you throw in a couple of handfuls of candy corn (i like the mix that includes the brown ones and the little pumpkins.) Then you add as many assorted nuts as your little heart desires. Put saran wrap over your bowl and shake the shit out of it. This should thoroughly mix things up. Whenever your mix looks most appealing to you, stop fucking shaking it. And that's it! Now you have your own batch of Evil Eva's Super Easy Halloweeny Treat Mix! Put it in a cute bowl (i used the clear pumpkin bucket in the picture above) and enjoy!

Now, let's talk cupcakes, y'all. Truth Serum Time: Cupcakes are probably my all-time favorite treat EVER! i don't know what it is about them. i prefer them over actual cake. Which is kinda weird because what are cupcakes but cakes adorable little sister. Anyhoo, there's no real rhyme or reason, i just love me some cupcakes. So whenever we have an event, i usually make them. But not this year. This year my mom took the cupcake-makin' reigns. Here's the cuteness she came up with:

Witch Leg Cupcakes:

All you have to do to achieve this delicousness is make whatever flavor cupcakes you want and ice them like you normally would. The legs are made from paper straws (i found these at Michaels craft store) and my mom free-handed the witch's boot on a piece of black scrapbook paper. You cut a little groove in the end of the straw and just slide the boots in. Stick the legs in the cupcakes and you're all done, son!

My mom also made some Vampire Bites and Reese's Pieces Polka Dots.

The Reese's Pieces Polka Dots are pretty self-explainitory. Just make a cupcake, ice it, and place Reese's Pieces on it. The Vampire Bites (which are kinda hard to see in this pic) are really easy to make too. All you have to do is, again, make a cupcake, ice it with vanilla icing, then take red decorating gel and put the tube into the top of the cupcake and squeeze the gel out until it makes little holes. Make two on each of your cupcakes and you're finished.

Costumes:

This is a Halloween party after all, so costumes are a definite must. And please, for the love of God, y'all, when you're invited to a COSTUME party, DRESS UP IN A COSTUME. 
You don't have to spend a lot of money. You don't have to come up with some elaborate outfit. It's not rocket science. Just think and try to be creative. And if that fails, well, just hit Google. 

Note From The Fangirl:
Please don't be that asshole in the "This is my costume" t-shirt. No self respecting fangirl would EVER be caught dead in something that non-jazzy. 

Fangirl Pro Tip #123:
Having trouble thinking of a costume? Having trouble affording a costume? Don't wanna be dressed as the same thing you've been for the past 4 Halloweens in a row? 
Have a costume swap! Get your friends together a few weeks before your party, tell your girls to bring all their old costumes, and swap! That way you get a new-to-you costume, you don't have to pay for it, and your friend feels better about buying it in the first place because now it's been worn more than once! Everyone wins!    

The Soundtrack:

i'm a music fanatic. i'm also pretty much the Queen of Mix Tapes. (See kids, mix tapes are the 90s version of what you would call a "playlist.") So, to me, you can't have a party without music. i personally have quite a few Halloween-themed CDs. If you don't, that's no problem. Itunes offers a butt ton of options. You can buy an entire CD or you can get crafty and mixy and make your own personal jam. 
This year i used a compilation of scary noises. My fave though is called Classic Horror Films because it's got the Halloween theme music. Which is the most terrifying thing EVER.  

After The Party:

Thank Yous:
i'm from the South so my Mama always taught me that whenever you have an event you ALWAYS send out thank you notes. Shoot for two days after your party as your deadline. i'll give you up to at least three but if you go over a week without sending a thanks then you're tacky and i'm gonna have to blessyourheart. (This is also a Southern thing. If you don't get it, sorry, cuz i don't even know how to begin to explain it to you.) 

Day-After Shopping: 
If you had a blast planning, executing and enjoying your party, you may want to have another one next year. The best time to plan for that shizz? Um, NOW. 
If you now wanna be an annual Halloween party-thrower, a good idea is to wait until the day AFTER Halloween this year when everything is 50% and 75% and that elusive 90% off, and then rack up on things you can use NEXT year. That's called party preparedness, kids! 

Fangirl Pro Tip #44:
Large plastic containers are a fangirls best friend. Well, a fangirl that throws parties, anyway. Because i'm a tad bit OCD i like to buy plastic containers, fill them with my themed party supplies and then label them as such. (Many a person has made fun of me for this quirk but when they specifically want to know where they can find a straw sombrero, well that would be in the fiesta box. And now that it was sooooo easy to find, it doesn't seem all that crazy, does it?)  

Further your fangirl education by checking out these helpful links:

*The original instructions for Eyes In The Bushes via Thrifty Crafty Girl. 
*How to make a pumpkin cake using a bundt pan. i really liked this idea and wanted to do it this year but, alas, it didn't work out for me. Maybe next year! (from A Merrier World.)
*You can purchase your own bloody bathroom (but you'll come out MUCH cheaper if you diy.) (from Squidoo.)
*Wanna give out ribbons for Best Costume? Here's a cute idea for making your own. (from Make It Easy Crafts.)
*And, of course, that bitch of a time-suck: Pinterest!
*And because now i have to hear it.

How To Fangirl

If you're a loyal reader of this blog (thank you very much!) you already know that here at Nancy Drew Is My Homegirl, we like to fangirl about pretty much everything.
But if you're new 'round these parts and don't know what this whole "fangirl" business is all about, fear not because i'm here to explain.

Let's start with the basics.

What is a fangirl?
A fangirl is an extremely awesome gal that gets easily excited over random, usually geeky things.

But wait, isn't being geeky a bad thing?
HELL NO! Being a geek and/or a dork, nerd, or weirdo is one of the greatest things you can EVER be! So if anyone ever calls you by one of those names, take it as the compliment it is, for being a geek (and/or a dork, nerd, or weirdo) simply means that you really enjoy things and aren't afraid to show your love for them in a really big and often times public manner. What's wrong with that? Answer: Absolutely nothing! In fact, it makes geeks and the like pretty much the bravest people on the planet. Because even though what they love might seem "uncool" or "unpopular," they go right on loving it anyway. Bravest. People. EVER!  

Now, you may be thinking to yourself, that's a good point, Evil Eva. This fangirl stuff sure sounds like the bees knees. So what can i do to become a fangirl?
That's the best part! You don't have to do anything! It you want to be a fangirl, congratulations, you are a fangirl!
In fact, the only thing required of a fangirl is a deep, abiding love for anything that you already love deeply and abidingly.
It's. That. Simple!

However, all that being said, there may be times when you think: how can i properly fangirl over this particular moment?
Well don't you worry your pretty little head over that. Because that's what this feature is all about.
How To Fangirl is about taking something that is already totally awesome and completely fangirl-worthy and making it even more awesome and fangirl-worthy!
And since i fancy myself a fangirling expert, i'll be using this new feature to share all kinds of tips and tricks and pics to show you guys ways you can enhance any situation like a true fangirl!

Sound good? Ready to get your fangirl on?
Keep checking back to my blog for this brand spankin' new feature: How To Fangirl!

Coming Soon!   

EvilEva's Trailer Park Classes It Up With Classic Books Into Movies

Welcome back to the Trailer Park, y'all. i don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of literary classics are headed to the big screen.
So in the effort to class up this joint, i present to you some snooty-tootie trailers for books-into-movies that scare the pants off of me. Not because they're horror, mind you, just because they're long and complicated and very Tolstoy-y. 

See, this is my problem with "the classics." Even though i'm a nerd that loves to read, i'm actually kinda stupid and these "classics" confuse the hell out of me. To this day even hearing the words "Great Expectations," makes me want to punch someone in the face and then burst into tears. Weird but true. That book has been the bane of my bookish existence and my book kryptonite since the 10th grade.
Anyhoo, that's why i generally stay away from the classics, because they bring on bouts of facepunchery and tears.
The movie industry, however, does not care for my tale of woe and instead is hell bent on introducing me to this Pip kid along with his equally stuffy and hard-to-understand friends Count Vronsky, Sal Paradise, and Jean Valjean.
Now let me just admit that even though i'm a book nerd and all that, i haven't actually read any of these books. The closest i've come is Cliffs Notes on Great Expectations. (P.S. Thanks, Cliff! You cheating lil' bastard.)
And while we're being truthful with one another, i might as well admit that i have also never seen any movies/plays/miniseries/masterpiece theaters based on any of these books either. i'm just shame-faced all around. 
So since i don't really have any clue (or many clues, rather) what these books are actually about, i'll just write what i think based on what i've gathered from the trailers. Ready? Here we go.  

We'll start with the trailer for Anna Karenina.
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
First off Anna Karenina is an extremely hard name to write and say. It's kinda like banana. There are just way too many n's and a's. i mean, how many na's are in this thing?
Anyhoozie, the story goes something like this (more or less): A fiercely and fancy-dressed Keira Knightley marries Jude Law who seems kinda sanctimonious about her affair with an unfortunately blond and hideously mustachioed Aaron Johnson (who has something very Colonel Mustard about him going on) considering Jude's own affair with that British nanny. (This fact may be from his real life and have no basis in this movie.)
Anyway, apparently everyone is all Team Jude and they think poor Keira is a total slut. Other than gossip about Keira Knightley, the townsfolk also enjoy ice skating, horse races, dance parties, and long rides on the Hogwarts Express! Then poor Keira gets knocked up, Jude Law gets even more sanctimonious and Colonel Mustard goes crazy. And someone probably dies. i mean, the trailer didn't really show that but let's face it, affairs in movies NEVER end well. i just hope poor Keira Knightley doesn't own a bunny.

Now let's move on to the Les Miserables trailer:
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
Hmm, this one is a bit of a toughie. The trailer doesn't really give me many details to go on but here's what i gleaned from this minute and 37 seconds.
Things are evidently gonna get musical up in this piece as Anne Hathaway warbles her way through that song Susan Boyle sang on Britain's Got Talent lo those many years ago when people thought that only attractive people had the ability to sing and were totally shocked that Susan was actually *gasp* good. i mean, really, had those people never heard of Clay Aiken before?
Anyhoo, back to Les Miz--- Hugh Jackman is in it and he looks really rough and somewhat Jude Law-ish. i really thought he was Jude Law when i first saw him. But no, it's Hugh Jackman and a months growth of facial hair. 
There are also poor people. Lots and lots of poor people. Poor people in the streets! In the woods! In a factory! On boats! Hooray for poor people!
Ok somewhere between looking like Jude Law and poor people, Hugh Jackman has managed to find a razor. Oh thank God! That was a close one.
Russell Crowe is also in this movie. He looks like a total jerk. Which isn't very surprising because he kinda looks like a jerk in every movie he's in. But unlike every other person in this movie, he doesn't look poor. So... good for him?
Anyway, Amanda Seyfried is in this movie too.  i don't know if her breasts can still tell when it's raining or if she's still carrying on her affair with Aaron Echols but she kinda looks like the poor mans Princess Buttercup in this flick. It's unclear whether she's an actual princess or maybe  just some hippie.
When Anne Hathaway isn't singing, she's chopping off all of her hair which we're supposed to think it looks chic short. We're also supposed to think Anne can sing. 
This is obviously gonna be some huge, sweeping epic although even after viewing the trailer i still don't know what this movie is about. Except poor people. Perhaps i need to read the book first before viewing this one.       

It's time to watch the trailer for On the Road:
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
This seems like a total hipster movie. i mean, having not read the book and based solely on the trailer i can imagine many a hipster douche walking around with a tattered copy of On the Road in their back pocket. It seems tailor made for those intellectual phonies that like to brag about how their favorite book of all time is Catcher in the Rye or War and Peace just because it makes them seem so fucking superior to you and me who, like a normal person, would admit that our favorite book of all time is Harry Potter. Because It's AWESOME. NOT because it makes us sound smart and sophisticated and too cool for school. Just because it's AWESOME. 
 Anywaysies, (which isn't an actual word but one i made up and like saying because it feels good so take that hipster douches that are sneering at my incorrect word usage.) it's the 40s or 50s or some other era, i don't know, i'm not good with cars. There are also typewriters and jazz if that helps.  Some dude in a flannel shirt decides to take a road trip with some other dude in a white T and for some reason they decide to take sadsack Kristen Stewart with them. Ugh, last person i would wanna take on a road trip EVER.
Anyway, in my estimation this movie is basically the dude-bro version of Crossroads. Although i don't know if there will be a karaoke battle in this movie. Probably not. i don't think guys do that. And even though K Stew played Joan Jett in The Runaways, i don't think she could totally nail I Love Rock n Roll for gas money like Brit-Brit can.           

And finally the trailer i dread the most, Great Expectations:
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
Ok so truthfully here's what i immediately thought while watching this trailer:
Great Expectations. Starring:

That's all my Harry Potter soaked brain could see upon viewing this trailer for the first time. After i realized that this wasn't actually a Harry Potter film (even though it stars about half of the cast of any given HP movie AND was directed by the director of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire) i figured i should probably give it a second watch. So upon my second viewing of the trailer, here's what i think Great Expectations is actually about:

So there's this kid, Pip, and he somehow gets tangled up with some old cray crone named Miss Havisham who seems a little too involved in the love lives of children. Especially since one of said children is her adopted daughter, Bitchy Ginger. And, of course, Pip falls in love with Bitchy Ginger because men (even at a young age) are fairly stupid and love them some bitches.  

So Pip grows up and becomes friends with Hagrid and apparently he gets rich because of some mystery benefactor (which is something i hope to have one day as that sounds like the best thing EVER.) But even though Pip is loaded and has access to dragons and griffins and shit, all he really wants is the sweet, sweet lovin' of Bitchy Ginger. 

But, unfortch for Pip, Bitchy Ginger seems to have grown bitchier with age and so she waltzes with some other dude that's not Pip right in front of actual Pip's face. Pip's pissed. 

Then Lord Voldemort shows up and there's a ship and Pip whines about Bitchy Ginger some more and Bellatrix LaHavisham's dress catches on fire. But i guess LaHavisham doesn't die because she brags about how she totally fucked up Bitchy Ginger's emotions. And then Pip whines some more about his unrequited love for Bitchy Ginger. And after writing the word "ginger" so many times, it makes me wish that there was a Weasley in this story somewhere but, alas, there is not.   

So that's my take on things. What do you guys think? Have you read any of these books? Was i even remotely close with my assessments? (Let's be honest: probably not.)

Will you see any of these movies while you're really just anxiously waiting for Catching Fire to come out? Sound off in the comments and tell me what ya think.    

Books Into Movies And TV News: Lightning Round!

So recently i took a gander at my Favorites tab and noticed that i've favorited a butt ton of Books Into Movies and TV news that i haven't shared with you guys yet. Now i'm gonna super unload on y'all! So buckle up and let's do this thang!

Catching Fire Movie News:
*The role of Mags has been cast. It goes to Lynn Cohen who you might remember as Magda on Sex in the City. i actually like this casting decision. What do you guys think?
*Enobaria will be played by Meta Golding. i've never seen her in anything so i don't know about this one.
*Enobaria's District 2 counterpart, Brutus, will be played by Bruno Gunn. Never heard of him either.
*Hey, someone i actually recognize has been cast! Alan Ritchson (or as i know him: that guy that played Aquaman in those few episodes of Smallville) snagged the role of Gloss.
*Also from District 1, the role of Cashmere goes to Stephanie Leigh Schlund.
*The role of Chaff is now off the table. E. Roger Mitchell landed the role of one of District 11's victors.
*And finally, perhaps the BIGGEST Catching Fire news: Finnick has been cast. It seems the rumors were true and he'll be played by Sam Clafin. Thoughts? Feelings? i just don't know about this one. To me, Finnick's casting is to Catching Fire as Peeta's casting was to The Hunger Games: i.e. Super Ass Important. And i've never seen this Sam Clafin in anything. And, well, just think about how that whole Peeta (and Gale) thing turned out. i think Josh Hutcherson and Liam Hemsworth did ok but i don't think they were the perfect people for the job. And this Sam Clafin character, just isn't who i was expecting. i was really pulling for Ian Somerhalder. How awesome would that have been? Damon Salvatore as Finnick Odair? Although i think he's a little too old for the part, i still think it would've been pretty amazing!

Wouldn't you rather have Damon Salvatore?

    

Mortal Instruments Movie News:

*According to Cassandra Clare herself, Kevin Zegers has won the role of Alec Lightwood, Isabel's bro and Jace's bestie.
*Here's a two-fer: The part of Madame Dorothea goes to CCH Pounder, while Aidan Turner takes on the role of Luke Garroway.
*Brother Jeremiah of the Silent Brothers has been cast. This creepy role will be played by Stephen R. Hart.
*Apparently Jonathan Rhys Meyers is in talks to play series baddie, Valentine.

The Vampire Diaries TV News:

*Elena, Stefan and Damon confess about compulsion.
*Tyler talks taking on Klaus in Season 4.
*Amy from The Nine Lives of Chloe King (or Grace Phipps as she's actually known) will be playing the role of a girl named April that has some sort of connection with the Gilbert kids.
*Phoebe Tonkin (aka Faye from that shit bucket of a show The Secret Circle) will also be joining the cast this season as Hayley, a girl from Tyler's past. 
*Check out the season 4 promo which is mostly bits from season 3's finale and like 2 seconds of the new season but it's still very exciting!



Now i wanna know what you guys think. Are you liking these casting decisions so far? Is Sam Clafin your number one choice? If not, who would be your ideal Finnick? Are you excited about the Mortal Instruments movie? Who do you think would make a kick ass guest appearance on Vampire Diaries? Chat it up in the comments section and tell me what ya think.  

Evil Eva Reviews... Trail Of The Spellmans

EvilEva reviews ...... Trail of the Spellmans by Lisa Lutz. 

Dissecting The Cover:

This cover is very simple but still conveys what the story is about. It's another Spellman mystery. There will be sleuthing. There may be a lurker. There could be some sneaking around. A flashlight might come into play. It's very Grown Up Nancy Drew!

Let's Review:

Those zany Spellmans are back with even more mystery-solving and family-dysfunction.
Isabel has more cases than ever (some of which have actually been assigned to her.) So she's keeping busy.
The rest of the Spellmans, however, are displaying serious signs of extreme suspicion.
Her mom has suddenly developed an odd obsession with extracurricular activities like pottery, yoga and learning to speak Russian. Her dad is keeping secrets about the family business. Secrets that could directly impede the progress of one of Izzy's cases. And war has been declared between David and Rae. Not that they'll admit why they're at odds.
Further complicating matters, Isabel's boyfriend, Henry Stone, wants her to meet his mother. He also wants to have "a talk." But Izzy's not really into mother-meeting or talk-having so she throws herself into her work instead. 
Adam Cooper wants Isabel to follow his sister. Margaret Slayter wants her husband tailed. The Blakes want to know what debauchery their daughter, Vivien has gotten into while away at college. And Walter Perkins needs someone to constantly check on his appliances to make sure they're properly turned off and unplugged. 
So just another day of sleuthing, drinking, bickering, snarky-remarking, family-tailing, boyfriend-dodging and conversation-avoiding. Or simply, just another day in the life of Isabel Spellman.

Here's What I Think:

Trail of the Spellmans is our fifth go round with the wild and wacky Spellman clan so by now we pretty much feel like part of the family. And part of the family business. And as an honorary PI, we've got a lot of sleuthing to do.
There are enough mysteries crammed into this book to satisfy all you fellow mystery-lovers out there. Not only do we have Isabel's legitimate cases, we've also got some family secrets to figure out. And some relationship drama to avoid deal with.
Really this whole book is a massive jumble of mysteries. Which is good because it seems like mystery novels have become somewhat scarce these days.
But because Izzy is so busy snooping on her family, it leaves very little time for her to actually socialize with them. And that insane Spellman family dynamic is something that I've always loved about this series. So I really missed that aspect. Especially where Rae is concerned.
Rae has always been one of my favorite characters. She started out as a whip smart, sassy 14 year old gumshoe. But book 5 finds her in college and kind of over the whole investigative business. Which is pretty much a dagger to my heart. I thought if any of the Spellmans made the transition from Harriet M. Welsch kiddo-spy to Jessica Fletcher senior citizen sleuth, it would for sure be Rae. But, alas, it seems as though it was not meant to be. *wails and moans in fangirlish fashion*
Another of my faves that's noticeably absent for most of this book is Henry Stone. Which is a fucking shame because I love Henry and totally want to have his fictitious babies.
But Izzy isn't ready for that kind of commitment and so she spends most of her time trying to avoid him. Which isn't that surprising given that Lisa Lutz isn't really known for her blatant use of swoon. Izzy has always been more of a runner than a romantic, things get serious and Izzy is so outta there. I do wish she would settle down a little bit though. She's got a good guy in Henry and it would be awesome if she could see that. 
I mean, I'm not asking for a marriage proposal or anything, but it would've been nice for Henry to make a few boyfriendly appearances. 
So really my only problem with this book was the lack of our usual suspects.
Because Lisa Lutz has done such a great job over the years of endearing these characters to the reader and making them so lovably flawed that we miss them when they're not there. And while Isabel is an amazing main character, this series is really at its best as an ensemble.
My ONLY problem is that I just can't get enough of these characters!
Other than that non-problem, Trail of the Spellmans is yet another funny, foul-mouthed, mystery-packed extravaganza that left me eagerly anticipating book 6.

Swoony Times:

As I mentioned before, I LOVE Henry Stone. I've loved him since the very first book. You know who he's always reminded me of? Luke Danes from Gilmore Girls. Sure, at first he seems kinda grouchy and very no-nonsense but he's also really sweet and caring and you can't help but fall for him with each turn of the page.
But where is Henry in this book? I'll tell you where he isn't--- anywhere to be found. Well that's not true, actually. He is in the book just not nearly enough.
Things start getting a little too serious for the couple, so, of course, it's time for Izzy to bail. Unfortch, we the reader are forced to bail with her. 
This isn't some new development though. It's pretty much a pattern with Isabel. Girl's immune to the swoon. I'm not though. And as I said before, I'd be more than happy to pop out 2 or 3 gruff but kindhearted lil' Henrys.

Bonus Shizz:

Mysteries!
Check the name of this blog, homey, I'm always down for a good mystery! Couple it with seriously sarcastic smartassery and I'm really down.
And Lisa Lutz has got this shizz down to a science.
In Trail of the Spellmans there's no shortage of mystery. And each is as delightfully ridiculous as the next! There's The Case of the Possibly Philandering Husband, The Secret of the Somewhat Wayward Daughter and The Mystery of the Unexpectedly Plugged-In Toaster, just to name a few.

Dysfunctional Families!
Is it just me or are dysfunctional families just so totes fun? I mean, it's right there in the name--- dys-FUN-ctional! And the Spellmans are definitely a dysfunctional family. But that's also what makes them such a fun bunch!
They all have such strong personalities, they're all so individually quirky and that nutty family dynamic is one of the things that makes this series so enjoyably readable.

If You Liked That, Try This:

Bad Kitty by Michele Jaffe.
The Heather Wells series by Meg Cabot.  

The Scale Of Judgment Says:

...... 4.
I love a good, snark-filled mystery! Can this become a new book trend, please?

Shadowhunters And Mockingjays And Oz, Oh My! (OR Books Into Movies News)

In the past few week, oodles of Books Into Movies news has hit the internet. So let's catch up, shall we?

i'll start with (in my opinion) the most important Books Into Movies news. That would be Catching Fire, of course. 
*A while back there was a rumor that Philip Seymour Hoffman might be cast as Plutarch Heavensbee. Well, now it's official. Welcome to the madness, sir.
*Also cast, Amanda Plummer will play Wiress. i've never heard of her but based on her pic alone, i'm all for her. So DON'T disappoint me, Amanda! 
*Add this one to the rumor pile, Tony Shalhoub is reportedly hoping to nab the role of Beetee. It doesn't seem like anything's official yet.
*Nooooooooo! It seems that Jenna Malone as Johanna Mason is gonna happen. i just noticed that they have the same initials. NOT that that means anything. It's certainly not fate. And so i repeat, Noooooooooooooo!
*Now for the MOST IMPORTANT of the most important news: We finally have our Finnick! Maybe. But let's not celebrate just yet. Put down your confetti, guys. Cos i just don't know about this one. The role has "allegedly" been offered to some guy named Sam Claflin. Who IS Sam Claflin?!?!? Well, according to imdb, which i quickly looked up just now, he played in Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (which i still haven't seen) and Snow White and the Huntsman (which i also still haven't seen.) So i'm at a loss for who this cat is. So the next logical step would be: Google Search!!! So i got a butt-ton of images and decided on this one:

Is this the face of Finnick Odair?

What do y'all think? Is this dude who you were envisioning when you were introduced to Finnick? Me neither. But i wasn't envisioning Lenny Kravitz as Cinna either and that one turned out pretty well. So let's try to reserve our judgment for his performance and not just his face. 
*And lastly in Hunger Games movie news, it seems your next 3 Novembers will be spent with Katniss & Co. The release dates for the final 3 movies hit the internet a few weeks ago. Catching Fire will arrive in theaters November 22nd, 2013. Mockingjay Part 1 (yeah, it's being split into two movies. Boooo!) will be out November 21st, 2014. And Part 2 of Mockingjay will be heading to theaters November 20th, 2015.

*Another popular YA series that's had a lot of movie news lately is The Mortal Instruments.
First, check out a glimpse of the teaser poster (which is apparently a thing now, i guess?)  
Next we've got some casting to discuss. The role of Simon has finally been cast and it goes to someone named Robert Sheehan. i've never heard of him (i'm sensing a theme here. Are these Books Into Movies purposefully casting little-knowns? Hmm.) So what do you guys think? Simon material?
*In other casting news, Kevin Durand and Robert Maillet will be playing Pangborn and Blackwell, the disgraced Shadowhunters and Valentine's bitches.
*And in EVEN MORE casting news, the role of Magnus Bane goes to Godfrey Gao, Jocelyn Fray will be played by Lena Headey and Hodge will be played by Jared Harris. Three more peeps i've NEVER heard of.

There's a new Wizard of Oz movie coming soon! And it looks sooooooooo good! It stars James Franco as the great and powerful Oz before he was all great and powerful. i think James Franco is a good choice to play Oz. He's got just the right amount of oddball-osity to pull it off. Joining him in the movie, Michelle Williams, Rachel Weisz and Mila Kunis will play the 3 witches. Glenda, the Wicked Witch and the one the house fell on, i guess, respectively. 
Check out the trailer:   



i love how the trailer starts out small and in black and white and then the screen moves out and goes to color. It's supposed to be out sometime in March of 2013.

So what do you think about all this new news? Which movies are you excited about the most? Are you happy with any/all of the new casting decisions? Sound off in the comments and tell me what ya think.

Breaking Down Breaking Dawn: A Second By Second Analysis Of The Trailer For Part 2

What up, you Book Into Moive-lovin'  peeps out there. As you probably already know, the official trailer for Breaking Dawn Part 2 graced the interweb a few weeks ago. While i'm slow to the party, i'm finally here, y'all! So without further ado, it's time to analyze the shizz outta the newest Breaking Dawn trailer.
First, let's watch this masterpiece together. Then i'm gonna break it down for you with my thoughts on what is (mercifully) the final movie in this franchise! (Unless someone gets the bright idea that we need to form a tighter bond with that Bree Tanner chick. *throws self in front of bus to stop the madness*)  
Let's do this shit!!!



0:01 seconds in- "After 18 years of being utterly ordinary, i finally found i could shine." i just had to completely change everything about myself first. Starting with my species. That sounds about right.

0:01-0:23 seconds in- Ok this is just the same shizz you tried to feed us in the teaser trailer. Give us some new stuff to look at, Twilight.

0:27 seconds in- Maggie Grace with her creepy ass vampire eyes would like to report that the Cullens have done something terrible. Yeah, we know, Maggie Grace. They named their daughter Renesmee. i mean, can you even fucking IMAGINE?!?! P.S. Maggie Grace, it might interest you to know that your stepbrother/former lover from Lost, Ian Somerhalder is a vampire now too! How 'bout a family reunion! The Salvatores are waaaaaay better than the Cullens. Trust me on this one. ;) 

0:33 seconds in- Bella is now a sassy vampire. Or as sassy as someone who is constantly morose can be. 

0:39 seconds in- Did Aro raid Neverland? Why does he look like he just stepped out of a Michael Jackson video? Or maybe that Gwen Stefani video? Is Aro now a Hollaback Girl? Is his shit bananas b-a-n-a-n-a-s!  

0:44 seconds in- Lord Jesus! Alice sees some future that's so fucking crazy she actually Drops. A. Vase! Um, haven't you been psychic for like A Bajillion Years!?!?! Seems like things would stop being so surprising if that shock happened to you Every Goddamn Day.

0:50 seconds in- The Volturi are evidently coming all the way from Narnia to see Renesmee. Impressive.

0:54 seconds in- Oh good, the Cullens have recruited what appears to be the "Creepy Uncle Sector" of the vampire world.

0:55 seconds in- As well as some chicks that are hoping Pocahontas will be the next Disney movie to hit Broadway. Maybe they can teach Renesmee to paint with all the colors of the wind.

0:57 seconds in- Jacob the Baby Licker makes a joke about the freaky, stupid vampire eyes. Nice try, Jacob but i'm still Team Winchester.

0:58 seconds in- Ooh! Apparently this is gonna be "The Epic Finale." i guess that sounds better than what i would have put at the end. Which would've been "Hooray! It's Finally Over!" 

0:59 seconds in- Hey look! Vampires can move water! With jazz hands! If a dance battle between the Cullens and the Volturi breaks out, it might just save this movie. Quick, someone get Channing Tatum to step it up!  

1:02 minutes in- The Cullens and their peeps go all Hands Across America.

1:02-1:05 minutes in- Someone gets punched into a wall, people are flying through the trees, there are wolves also venturing out from Narnia. It's So. Fucking. EPIC!

1:06 minutes in- Bella's gonna go toe to toe with........ the Rhythm Nation? Seriously Aro, what the fuck are you wearing?

1:09 minutes in- Aw, Bella has a touching moment with her stupidly named daughter.

1:10-1:12 minutes in- Now let's all run at each other all fiercely and shit. It's like a game of Ultimate Red Rover. Red Rover, Red Rover send DEATH right over!

1:15 minutes in- November 16th, bitches! Are. You. READY!?!?

Well that's it, possibly the final trailer for a Twilight movie EVER. How are you guys feeling? Sad because you actually love the story? Relieved that it's finally over so you no longer have to watch Kristen Stewart's constipated face anymore? Ready for Catching Fire to hurry up and get made so as to wash the sour taste out of your mouth that Breaking Dawn is sure to leave? Feel free to share any and all comments you might have in the section below.  

JK Rowling's New Book Look! Plus Books Into Movies Linky-Dinkage

Yes! We FINALLY get a glimpse of the cover of JK Rowling's new book! Which we'll get to in a minute. But first, it's time for more Books Into Movies news! Are y'all ready for all this booky and movie-y(?) (that doesn't sound right.) goodness? Alright, well here we go...

i'll start off with the news that i'm not all that jazzed about, to tell you the truth. So the latest Catching Fire casting rumor is that Jena Malone has been offered the role of Johanna Mason. Are y'all like me? Are you thinking "do huh?" i just don't know about this one. She's not even remotely who i pictured playing Johanna. Although, yes, truth be told, i didn't actually have an actress in my head that would be the perfect Johanna but i know that if i did it wouldn't be Jena Malone. i'm dying to know what y'all think about this news. Do you think Jena is a good choice? Do you have a better chickie in mind? Hop on down to the comments and tell me who you think deserves the part. 

Johanna Mason? i don't think so.

  
While we're on the subject of The Hunger Games, i'm sure you all know that the DVD will be out soon. August 18th to be exact. You can preorder it right this very instant from loads of stores. If you preorder from Best Buy you can get a free District 12 keychain. Target boasts an exclusive 3 disc deluxe set. While Barnes & Noble offers up a cloth poster of Katniss for their preorderers.     

We haven't had any news on the Mortal Instruments movie in awhile so how 'bout i give ya a lil' dish. The role of Isabelle Lightwood has been cast. It goes to an actress by the name Jemima West. Never heard of her but we'll see how she does. Truthfully, Isabelle was one of my fave characters from City of Bones (the only book in the series that i've read so far. i know! Don't judge me!) But i'm guessing everyone is all set to drool over the Clary/Jace coupling. i think i'm in the minority of liking Isabelle and being firmly on Team Simon.
Anyhoo, what do you guys think of the cast so far? Are you excited to see the Shadowhunters hit the big screen? Tell me your POV on the whole sitch in the comments.

LoTRers get ready to lose your shizz cos The Hobbit is on the July 13th issue of Entertainment Weekly! There's a HUGE spread with pics galore. Plus, geeky added bonus: there's also a Comic-Con preview! (P.S. the Oz the Great and Powerful poster art is super a-mah-zing!)   

The last little bit of news i've got for you involves this lady, i don't know if you've heard of her, a Ms. JK Rowling? Yeah, turns out she's got a new book coming out called The Casual Vacancy. Even though there's very little known about the book, peeps are already clamoring to get any piece of info they can on it. This week's bread crumb? It's the cover, y'all! Take a look and tell me what you think.

Well. It's very simple. And gives us exactly, um, NO CLUES as to what the book could possibly be about. But i'm still super duper excited! Oh and btw, the book will be out in stores September 27th.

So that's the news ya needs to know this week. Come back very soon cos i'll be dissecting the latest trailer for Breaking Dawn Part 2. There might be jokes made about Kristen Stewart's inability to look non-constipated. Oh hell, who am i kidding!? OF COURSE there will be jokes made about Kristen Stewart's inability to look non-constipated. You know you don't wanna miss that!