Thursday, October 6, 2011

Supernatural Shakedown: Season 7 Episode 2 OR My Imaginary Friend...Lucifer

It's Friday night. It's 9 o clock. So sit your Ass-butt down and lets watch some Supernatural!

Episode #2: Hello, Cruel World.
Previously on Supernatural...
Cass is the new God (as he likes to continue reminding us.) Lucifer appeared to Sam and told him that he's actually still in the pit, that he never left and all this Dean/Bobby/Cass business is the real hallucination. Dean bound Death so Death would do his bidding. His bidding being to kill Cass. That doesn't happen, Cass loses his shit, then gets all regret-y and the boys take him back to the lab to puke up purgatory. Cass chucks the souls but can't shake the leviathan, which have taken over his body and made him even cray crayer.

We start where episode 1 left off: Dean's down, Bobby's out and Cass is crazy.
Dean asks Cass or rather LeviaCass how many of the leviathan are swimming around inside of him. LeviaCass doesn't answer and instead bleeds profusely. Dean catches on that the more power the leviathan use, the closer they are to busting their vessel like a pinata.
LeviaCass realizes that much like that weasel everybody's always talking about, he's about to go pop! So he's gonna split but threatens Dean and Bobby that he's totes coming back for them. You know, when he's no longer bleeding out his eyeballs.
LeviaCass shuffles off, bleeding along the way.
Cut to Sam in a different part of Cass' Lab To Purgatory. He's pushed against a wall with Lucifer's hand around his throat.
Lucifer finally unhands my baby but tells Sam that he's still in the pit, that only he and Lucifer are real and everything else is just set dressing.
Lucifer repeats Sam's name but it's really Dean. He and Bobby have finally found Sam and they jar him outta his Lucifer-induced trance.
Dean tells Sam to get his shit together. They leave Cass' Lab To Purgatory.
Cut to LeviaCass, bloody as hell at the Municipal Waters place. He breaks the lock on the fence and wades into the water. Dean, Sam and Bobby catch up with him but stay on dry land.
LeviaCass goes over his head. Black gunk spreads through the water, contaminating it.
Oh great. It's the public water supply. 
Exploding black goo. Supernatural logo. Showtime!

Bobby says that if the leviathan are in the pipes then they've got a highway to anywhere. So in other words--- Not Good.
Dean sees Cass' trench coat floating in the water and picks it up. So i guess Cass is gone now? Wait. For real? Did Cass Cass's body explode underwater? Can he never be pieced back together? Noooooooooo! Pour one out, y'all. But only half cos he might not be for real real dead. He could just be Supernatural dead which sometimes means not dead at all! 
The guys leave and start the leviathan search.
Doomed people using water montage!
A little girl drinks water from a fountain and suddenly the water turns black. So....... she's obvs been infected. She shakes a little then gives an evil smirk. Y'all know how EvilEva HATES creepy, evil children.
Some dude is fixing his car in his garage. His sink starts acting a fool so he goes to check it out and gets a face full of black goo.
Bobby's! Sam's taking a nap. Sexily! Lucifer calls to him but when Sammy wakes up it's Dean.
He wants to check on Sam's hand that got all glassed up in the last episode. Meanwhile, Lucifer acts like a dick about it. Bobby enters and rebandages Sam's hand. Dean asks Sam how he's doing and tells him not to reply with an "ok." Sam tells him he's not doing ok. He admits that he's been hallucinating.
Dean asks why Sam didn't tell them about it before. Sam thought he could ride it out and get better on his own.
Sam finally tells Dean and Bobby about Lucifer and how he's been haunting Sam and how Lucifer told him that this life isn't real, he's just fucking with Sam for jollies. Enter Lucifer again, being a dick.
Lucifer is feeding Sam his lines, what to tell Dean and Bobby. Dean notices that Sam keeps glancing at a chair that's only holding books and asks if Sam is seeing Lucifer right now.
Dean tells Sam "you know he's not real, right?"
Sam looks all sad-face and says "he says the same thing about you." Awww.
Dean looks to Bobby, who is no help at all. He decides it's time to continue the search for the leviathan.
Evil Goo Girl's house! She's channel surfing. She catches a preview for a new episode for Dr. Sexy M.D. and gets a very wicked idea about organ theft.
Bobby's! Sam's taking apart and reassembling his gun while Dean and Bobby look up police reports. They are concerned about Sam's kookiness. So Dean turns on the GPS in Sam's phone so they can track him in case he tries to take off.
Dean's concerned that Sam might not be able to be fixed. Bobby asks Dean how he's doing, Dean lies and says he's fine, Bobby doesn't believe that for a minute and tells Dean that if he ever needs to talk that he'll be there for him. Dean makes a funny and Bobby calls him an idgit.
Boy's Locker Room! Uh oh. Looks like swim practice just let out. This can't be good. Goo Girl only got a mouthful and she's already super evil, these dudes have been immersed in it. Repeat---this can't be good. Two swimmers that look like they might have already been infected enter. One of the infected swimmers locks the door. He slams one of the non-infecteds into a wall. The other infected swimmer pounces on another of the non-infecteds Blood splatters.
Commercial break.

Hospital! Hey it's Sheriff Suite Life being annoyed by some old biddy that's telling her hospital horror stories. Which is just what you wanna hear when you're IN A HOSPITAL! No it's not, Old Biddy. Stop that.
Enter Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants. Sheriff Suite Life had an appendectomy so she'll be staying overnight, doped up on drugs.
Bobby's! Sam and Bobby found out about the swimmers and they want to pursue it. Sam and Bobby will stay behind while Dean follows the lead since Sam is a liability with his hallucinations and all.
Goo Girl! She's on a swing somewhere. Car Garage Guy meets up with her. That doesn't look too To Catch A Predator-y. Then Car Garage Guy makes it even pedophileier by telling Goo Girl that she's got an awful small body. Which sounds super pervy. Goo Girl is not happy with her little girl body cos she knows shit all and she can't even see over counters, it's total bullshit! Anyhoo, they discuss how hungry they are. Car Garage Guy apparently holds Goo Girl responsible for the swim team debacle. He tells her to fix it cos he doesn't like going to "the boss" with bad news. Goo Girl tells Car Garage Guy that she has an idea that could fix their hunger situation and she could use his help with it. My guess is the answer isn't simply giving the leviathan a Snickers.
Hospital! It's Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants again! He finds Goo Girl in one of the rooms. She's humming creepily. Goo Girl asks Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants if it's true that surgeons can get any body and take out whatever organs they want. Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants is aghast and is probably wondering where the fuck the parents of this creepy kid are.
Goo Girl grabs Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants' hand and starts breaking it. Then Goo Girl transforms into Dr. Sexypants while killing the real Dr. Sexypants.
Dexter! No, i'm kidding. It's just some guy analyzing the blood on the wall of the locker room. Dean, as a fake agent, enters the scene to investigate. He sees a line of black goo on one wall.
Hospital! Sheriff Suite Life is asleep. She wakes up and spies Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants giving Old Biddy anesthesia. Old Bitty is out and Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants wheels her out. Sheriff Suite Life is very concerned about whatever the hell is going on.
Bobby's! Sam's cell is ringing. Lucifer's hanging out reading some trashy rag. Sam ignores Lucifer and answers his phone. It's Dean confirming that the swim team were black gooed. Two of the swimmers are missing.
Lucifer thinks Prince William has found the right girl.
Sam tries harder to ignore Lucifer. Dean informs Sam that he's headed back to Bobby's.
Hospital! Sheriff Suite Life follows Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants. He takes Old Biddy to a part of the hospital that's closed for renovations so Sheriff Suite Life knows that no good must be going down. She goes after him.
Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants has Old Biddy on a table. He starts cutting into her and chowing down on her organs. Sheriff Suite Life sees this and is appropriately grossed out. She hauls ass outta there, finds a nurse in the hallway, starts trying to tell her about the organ-eatin' and promptly passes out.
And now a word from our sponsors.

Hospital! Sheriff Suite Life is back in her bed. Nursey-Poo tells her she shouldn't be wandering the halls in her condition. Enter Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants. Sheriff Suite Life is quietly freaking the fuck out. She comes up with a lie for why she was roaming the halls and Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants acts all creepy. Nursey-Poo injects Sheriff Suite Life's IV bag with something to help her sleep. Sheriff Suite Life quietly freaks the fuck out some more cos this is so not the time to be drowsy. Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants tells her he'll check on her later, then he and Nursey-Poo leave.
Sheriff Suite Life rips off her IV, gets her purse and tries to get the fuck outta there but dammit!, her meds start kicking in.
Bobby's! Sam asks Lucifer if this is all just in his head then why doesn't Lucifer just end it already. But Lucifer doesn't wanna end it. He likes making Sam slowly go insane. Lucifer tells Sam that it'll all end when Sam finally decides that he can't take it anymore. He tells Sam that that's probably why Sam's been cleaning his gun. Sam gets pissed and yells at Lucifer to shut up. Bobby walks in witnessing, as he puts it, Sam "having a little bag lady moment." Which i love and will totes use from now on! Thanks Bobby!
Sam's pretty frustrated with the whole hallucination thing. Bobby tries to comfort him by reminding him that he's beaten the devil before. Meanwhile, Lucifer is behind Bobby and he sticks one of those fireplace thingies with the sharp points through Bobby's back til it sticks out his front.
Sam is horrified but Bobby is none the wiser. Phone rings. It's Sheriff Suite Life. She tells Bobby about all the recent organ-eating shizz that's gone down at the hospital and wants him to help.
Bobby goes to check it out, leaving Sam by himself. Or with Lucifer, as the case may be.
Hospital! The swim team's there. Or two members of it anyway. Car Garage Guy is with them. Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants escorts them to their feeding ground. Nursey-Poo and another guy are strapped to wheelchairs. The swim team go to eat them. Car Garage Guy leaves on business that "the boss" has sent him on. Evil Nursey-Poo formerly swim team member, eats actual Nursey-Poo.
Bobby's! Sam's assembling his gun again. Dean's home. He says he followed the swim team here and there's a chance there's more of them. Dean needs Sam's help with this one. The boys leave.
Hospital! Bobby's wheeling Sheriff Suite Life out of the hospital. He puts her in a taxi and sends her home.
Bobby checks out the morgue to look for Old Biddy and finds that she's already been autopsied.
Impala! Dean asks Sam if the devil's riding shotgun in his noggin. Sam tells him yeah but not right now.
Dean gets all harsh and tells Sam that he's never gonna be ok. Sam looks really hurt.
Dean in the Impala by himself--- Wait. What?--- pulls up to Bobby's. He calls for Sam, notices that he's not there and leaves.
Sam and Not Dean pull up to some building. Not Dean tells Sam he needs to not trip balls while they're in there dealing with the leviathan. Then he proceeds to be a dick to Sam.
Not Dean opens the door for Sam, they walk in and suddenly they're in some kind of warehouse instead. Lucifer informs Sam that he's Not Dean. Sam starts walking off. Lucifer talks shit. Sam takes a shot at him but Lucifer is now on the other side of the warehouse. Lucifer tells Sam if he wants to point the gun at someone useful he needs to point it at his own face. Yeah Lucifer? Well you can go sit on a tack!
Lucifer tells Sam that his only way out of this hell is to kill himself. Don't listen to him, Sammy!
Hospital! Bobby's looking through what used to be Old Biddy when in walks Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants. Bobby flashes a badge and pretends to be some kind of agent. Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants recognizes Bobby. He says he saw Bobby through the angel's eyes. Bobby hits Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants upside the head with some metal medical instrument. Evil Dr. Salt N Pepper Sexypants gets full-on Venus Flytrap Vagina Face. Bobby shoots him. Black goo comes out. Bobby's satisfied with that and hauls ass outta there.
Real Impala! Dean's following Sam via GPS. He enters one of the many Supernatural Warehouses of Doom and calls to Sam.
Sam is standing there with Lucifer who suddenly turns into Not Dean who looks a lot like Actual Dean.
Sam points the gun at Actual Dean. He's all confused. Lucifer talks more shit and Sam shoots at him again which freaks Actual Dean out since he can't see Lucifer.
Dean tries to talk Sammy down. He tells Sam that the torture in hell feels different than the real life everyday pain. Dean takes Sam's hurt hand and squeezes it. Lucifer flickers. Sam sees the difference and starts pressing into his hurt hand. Lucifer flickers when he does it. Lucifer tries to confuse Sam but Sam just presses his hand harder while Dean pep talks him. Lucifer finally flickers away completely. Sam's gotten rid of him. For the moment anyway. Sam and Dean have a brotherly moment until Sam's phone rings. It's Bobby. He tells them Sheriff Suite Life was right about the hospital. He says when he shot the thing with silver buck shot it had no effect. He tells them to meet him back at the house. Sam and Dean leave.
In the Impala, Sam tells Dean that he's not seeing things anymore. They pull up to Bobby's and HOLY SHIT!!!, it's on fire!!! Noooooooooooooooooo!!! Please tell me Bobby wasn't in there! They can't kill off Cass and Bobby in the same episode!
Damn you, commercials!

Sam and Dean go through the charred mess that was Bobby's house. They can't find Bobby anywhere. Dean calls his cell but gets voicemail. He leaves a message and tells Bobby that he promised to meet them there and he better not be dead.
Sam runs into Car Garage Guy who tells him that he and Dean are worth annihilating. Dean shoots Car Garage Guy in the side of the head. Black goo erupts from his face but that's about it. Then he gets full-on Venus Flytrap Vagina Face, grabs Dean and tosses him onto a car. Dean falls off and breaks his leg. Sam punches Car Garage Guy in the face. Car Garage Guy goes down. There's a car hanging from one of those big claws or whatever they're called. Dean grabs the controls to the claw and releases the car. Car Garage Guy hits Sam's beautiful face with some kind of metal rod, knocking him out. The car splats on Car Garage Guy. Black goo seeps out of him.  
Dean crawls over to an unconscious Sam. Dean breaks out his cell and dials someone's number. We're not privy to whose.
More commercials.

Ambulance! Dean and Sam are strapped down on gurneys. An EMT is checking on Sam. He has head trauma. Sam. Not the EMT. Sam looks over and sees Lucifer. Lucifer says "hey so i'm not real. nobody's perfect. but i'm not going anywhere, Sam."
Sam starts seizing. The EMT says they're pulling into Black Goo Organ-Eaters General. Dean tells the EMT that he has to take them somewhere else. The EMT acts like a douche.
Bobby's Car Cemetery! Car Garage Guy's hand is sticking out from under the car that just fell on him. His black goo starts reversing under the car presumably back to his body. His fingers wiggle. Man! How do you kill these bastards?

Next time on Supernatural...
Dean's at Black Goo Organ-Eaters General. He doesn't know where Sam is. Meanwhile, Sam is apparently off gallivanting with Becca from Flash Forward. Y'all remember Flash Forward? i loved that show!

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