Thursday, November 24, 2011

Supernatural Shakedown: Season 7 Episode 8 OR Going To The Chapel And We're Gonna Get Buried

It's Friday night. It's 9 o clock. So sit your Ass-butt down and lets watch some Supernatural!

Episode #8: Season 7, Time For A Wedding!
Previously on Supernatural...
Sam was butt hurt because Dean killed his monster friend, Amy and kept it a secret from him, causing Sam to strike out on his own. But not for long. The boys rejoined forces on a ghost case. Dean got his flirt on. Sam eventually forgave him. And now they're back together again!

Las Vegas! Dean's hitting on a waitress in a strip club. Talk turns to Dean's "friend's" "brother" aka Sam. Apparently Sam is off on a hike right now. Stripper/waitress talks some sense into Dean. Dean's phone rings. It's Sam. He texted an address along with the message Wear Fed suit. Hmm, intriguing.
Little White Wedding Chapel! Dean walks down the hallway in his Suit of Sexiness! The lights start going wonky so Dean draws his gun.
Sam opens the door also rocking his Suit of Sexiness! He tells Dean to put his gun away because he won't be needing it. Sam escorts Dean into the chapel and places him in the Best Man Spot at the end of the aisle. Dean is super confused. As am i. He wants to know what they're hunting in a wedding chapel. Sam drops a bomb. He says life is short, he's in love and he's getting married!
Say whaaaat?!?!?!
Dean has the same reaction.
Suddenly the wedding march starts up and a bride is walking down the aisle.
Say whaaaat?!?!?!
Sam pushes up the veil and it's...... Crazy Super-Fangirl Becky!?!?!?
Say whaaaat?!?!?!
Wedding cake. Time for a wedding. Cake explodes into black goo. Supernatural logo. Cake topper falls. Showtime!

Dean's freaking out. He asks how the eff this happened. Sam tells him the short version which is he and Becky met, they ate, they fell in love and now here they are getting married. Say Whaaaat?!?!? Dean's concerned because Sam's previous hook ups haven't quite worked out so well. But Becky's read all the Supernatural books so who better to understand Sam's fucked up relationships than her.
Dean is hilarious! He asks Sam if he even bothered to make sure Becky was actually Becky. Becky assures Dean that they used holy water, salt, the whole nine yards. She's not a monster. 
Becky exits to pay the bill. Dean is hilarious again. He can't believe Sam would marry Becky of all people. i know, me either. i mean, i'm standing RIGHT HERE. Sam explains that he felt the same way about Becky that Dean did until he got to know her. 
Dean finds it very suspect that Becky just happened to be in Vegas at the same time they are in Vegas and wonders if she "read" about their Vegas trip in Chuck's books and decided to stop by. But Sam insists he's for realsies in love with Becky. They're going to Becky's place in Delaware. He tells Dean whenever he decides to be more supportive he can give them a call.
Becky excitedly tweets about being Mrs. Winchester. She and Sam leave. 
Later! At night! Dean calls Bobby and tells him that he's headed to Delaware. He tells Bobby that Sam is there with his wife. Dean wants Bobby to call him back as soon as he can.
Pike Creek, Delaware! Sam and Becky pull up to a restaurant that's hosting a 10 year reunion. 
Becky enters the restaurant and talks to the girl at the table who's apparently in charge of the reunion. And is perhaps a bitch. 
Yep, she's a bitch. She used to call Becky "Yechie Becky" which isn't even clever. Bitchy Classmate acts bitchy. Becky tells her she's there to RSVP for the reunion. Bitchy Classmate assumes Becky is attending the reunion alone. Then Sam walks up behind Becky. She tells Bitchy Classmate that she needs to mark her down with a plus one. Bam! Take that, Bitchy Classmate! In yo face! 
Sam and Becky leave. Becky tweets her victory over Bitchy Classmate. Then she runs over to a guy named Guy. She proudly displays her wedding ring and introduces Sam. Guy is very impressed with Becky's new husband. (As am i.) Guy needs to get back to work though. He's an event planner and is planning the reunion. Becky runs after him. She asks if he got her message. He says yes and tells her to give him a hug which is when he shiftily hands over a vial of something to Becky. Guy's a Wiccan! Becky put some kind of spell on Sam. Say whaaaat- solved. 
Dean rides up in his stolen Dodge as Sam and Becky are leaving. Dean goes into the restaurant and plops down at the bar. He notices a newspaper article titled "Truck kills pedestrian in freak accident. Victim a recent lottery winner." 
Dean is intrigued.
Becky's house! Dinner is laid out and Becky enters in some kind of lacy nightie thingie. Sam is wowed by Becky's lacy nightie thingie. But then he gets a weird headache. Becky asks if he's ok. Sam looks like he's wondering where the hell he is and why Becky is there in a lacy nightie thingie with him. Sam gets very confused. Becky rushes over and kisses him. Sam gets headachey again. Becky pours the stuff from the vial into Sam's drink and hands it to him. 
Sam drinks it and is back to being Becky's love slave again. Lucky bitch.
Baseball stadium! Some Guy's practicing his hitting. A creep in a hoodie watches from the stands. Creep in the hoodie makes creepy hand gestures. Suddenly the speed on the pitching machine goes all the way up. Some Guy hits the ball and the impact breaks the bat. Some Guy's all "whaaaaa?" 
More creepy hand gestures. The machine moves to face Some Guy. A ball flies out and pops him. Another ball flies and pops him again. Some Guy falls to his knees. Another ball flies out and directly into Some Guy's face. Blood splatters from Some Guy's face and he falls to the ground. Creep in the hoodie looks very pleased with himself.
Time for commercials.

Dean rings the doorbell at Becky's place and gifts Sam with a waffle iron. He's ready to be supportive. And i'm ready for waffles!
He gives Sam the deets on a new case in- shocker- this town. The first victim won the lottery and then got hit by a truck. The second vic went from the bench to the majors and then, as we all know, was killed by a pitching machine throwing a ball full-force into his face.
Becky starts talking from the next room about how she and Sam thought that it might be a crossroads demon but there's a 10 year wait for cashing in on those souls so then they thought maybe it was a cursed object but they haven't been able to connect the victims to each other yet.
Dean's all fuck the what?!?!? He's baffled why Sam is working this case with Becky. Sam thinks that Becky's Supernatural book-reading might make her an asset. Dean isn't buying this Sam being in love with Becky bullshizz and calls Becky out by telling her that he's gonna find out whatever mojo she's using on Sam.
Sam doesn't want Dean insulting his wife like that.
Dean says obvs people's dreams are coming true in this town and isn't it a little cowinky-dental that Sam's all of a sudden in love and married to Becky. Sam tells Dean that what he and Becky have is real and that if Dean can't accept it then that's his problem.
Dean says if he were Sam he'd be worried about Becky cos so far the peeps whose dreams came true got snuffed out shortly after.
Dean starts to leave. Sam tells him maybe the reason he's so upset is because Sam doesn't need him anymore. Dean gets touche face. He leaves and calls Bobby. Bobby offers another hunter for Dean to work with because he's too busy on the case he's working to help him himself. Dean begrudgingly accepts.
Doodles! Becky's doodling Sam hearts Becky all over a notebook. Then she totally sniffs her book. Sam comes in. Becky quickly stops with the name doodling and book sniffing. Sam presents Becky with his and hers ID badges. Sam hands her a newspaper. There's an article about a guy at an insurance company that went from a junior sales position to CEO.
Becky looks over the article. Sam finds her notebook and hilariously gushes over it.
Sam and Becky are gonna go check out the CEO lead.
Restaurant! Dean's looking for his new hunting partner. And isn't too jazzed when he finds out it's a scrawny dude named Garth who is currently slurping a milkshake.
But Garth is hilarious!
Dean agrees to work with him since he has no other option. He shows Garth the same article Sam showed to Becky. Before Garth reads up on the case he needs to check in with Marmaduke.
Insurance office! Dean and Garth wait to talk to the CEO. A woman named Marsha with an s-h-a is being a total b-i-t-c-h to the secretary. Marsha with an s-h-a leaves.
Sam and Becky enter the room. Garth makes a funny. Dean goes over to talk to Sam. Becky gives him the stink eye. Sam tells Dean there's no point in talking to the CEO because he's clean. Sam asks who Garth is. Dean makes a funny. Sam and Becky leave.
Dean and Garth go to interview the CEO. Dean starts questioning him. Garth is non-subtly hilarious.
Dean asks the CEO what it felt like when his big dream came true. CEO reveals that this wasn't his dream. Marsha with an s-h-a enters the room and tells the CEO that his secretary is an idiot. Turns out Marsha with an s-h-a is the CEO's wife. Seems this was her wish.
Dean and Garth follow Marsha with an s-h-a. Dean tries to warn her that she might be in danger. Marsha with an s-h-a thinks Dean's threatening her. Garth is hilarious some more.
Dean asks Marsha with an s-h-a what exactly she did to get her hubby promoted. Marsha with an s-h-a tells Dean to leave her alone and walks off.
Becky's house! Sam studies their Wall of Research while Becky tweets about their impending honeymoon.
Sam gets headachy again.
Becky goes for the vial but she's out because it spilled in her purse. Rut row.
Insurance office! Marsha with an s-h-a waits around for her driver to pick her up. Marsha with an s-h-a has a really snooty voice. Anyway, she's positioned right under a big ass light fixture. Not a good place to be.
Upstairs it's creep in the hoodie and his creepy hand gestures! He makes the light fixture fall but Dean pushes Marsha with an s-h-a out of the way.
Suddenly Marsha with an s-h-a is all chatty about how her husband got the CEO job. She tells Dean and Garth that she was bitching about his job when a guy overheard her convo and offered her a trade, the CEO gig for her soul.
Garth's confused because usually with soul-swapping you get 10 years before the demon comes to collect. So what the hell's going on here? Dean thinks Becky might be next so they need to head out to find Sam. Garth lays out their next course of action. Hilariously, of course.
Becky's house! Becky calls Guy and tells him to meet up with her because she's losing Sam. Sam comes in all headachy and asks Becky what's going on. She reminds him they got married. Sam is confused and wants to call Dean. Becky can't have that so she whacks him over the head with the waffle iron that Dean got them as a wedding present.
More commercials.

Some house! Sam's tied to a bed. Becky tells him to calm down. But Sam is back to his normal self and doesn't know why he's tied to a bed as Becky stares on, so he can't calm down.
Sam tells Becky to let him go. Becky's computer beeps. She goes to video chat with Guy. Sam can hear Becky explain to Guy that she needs more elixir. Guy agrees to help and tells her to meet him in an hour. Becky goes to check on Sam. He tells her he heard her convo with Guy. Becky tries to convince Sam that they were happy together. Sam makes a funny. He asks if she's aware that Guy is the one killing all those people.
Becky tells Sam that Guy isn't killing people, he's only a Wiccan. Sam tells her she's wrong and she's on the to-be-killed list. Becky insists that Guy's her friend. Sam insists that no he's not. He tells Becky that Guy's her dealer and asks how much he's charging her. Becky informs him that Guy's been giving it to her for free and that the elixir wouldn't work unless Sam really loved her deep down.
Sam asks Becky to untie him. Instead she shoves a rag in his mouth. It sounds like Sam gives a muffled fuck you to Becky as she leaves for more elixir.
Reunion Restaurant! Becky meets up with Guy. Guy goes to hand her the vial but stops himself and informs her she'll have to pay for it this time.
Guy is meanly hilarious. Becky agrees to pay. Guy wants her soul. He gets a bad case of red demon eye. Becky realizes that Guy isn't a Wiccan but a crossroads demon.
Guy loves a reunion. People are willing to sign over their souls for practically nothing. He admits to killing the other people. Becky's afraid if she hands over her soul a piano will fall on her head the next day. Guy schmoozes Becky and offers her a one time only deal. 25 years. She can keep Sam but she'll have to give up her soul and promise not to tell the Winchesters about their little deal. Becky agrees and Guy hands over the vial.
Becky's house! Dean and Garth break in. Garth finds Becky's computer which has her Twitter account displayed on it. Her last tweet was about her honeymoon with Sam. Garth hilariously recounts the tweet. i'm really loving Garth, y'all!
Dean notices a pic of Becky at her parents lake house. He takes the picture out of the frame and finds Loon Lake Family Cabin written on the back.
Family Cabin! Becky's back. She has a sad cos she can't show Sam off at her reunion like she wanted to. She tells him that she knows he doesn't really love her. She also knows that she's a loser. The only place she ever fit in was on the Supernatural message boards. And then she got to meet the real Sam and Dean and she nearly shit her pants over that. And she started dating Chuck, the writer of the Supernatural series and her life was amaze balls. But then Chuck dumped her. And she had another sad. All she wants is someone to love her for her. Sam keeps mumbling answers so finally Becky takes the rag out of his mouth. Sam tells her if she wants someone to love her for her maybe try not drugging them.
Becky gets upset and takes out the vial.
Sam tells her she's better than this.
Becky isn't so sure.
Reunion Restaurant! Becky's drinking. Guy walks in to a bar. Ha! Sorry i couldn't help myself. Actually Guy just walks into the bar section of the restaurant. He asks Becky what's up. Becky agrees to the soul-swap deal.
Time for a commercial break.

Becky has to kiss Guy to seal the deal. She goes to do so but instead flicks a lighter, drops it to the floor and ignites a demon snare. Sam, Dean and Garth enter from the wings. Becky is super proud of herself for double crossing the crossroads demon.
Dean wants to know how Guy is cheating the 10 year deals. Guy informs Dean he's not a cheater but an innovator. And he's killing people because he found a loophole in the contracts. They're called accidents, people. Sam asks if he's been arranging accidents in order to collect early. But Guy doesn't care to get his hands dirty. That's why he's got a demon intern.
Enter demon intern. It's creep in the hoodie! He shoots Sam, Dean and Garth across the room, then smudges the snare.
Dean drops the knife. So he throws holy water on Guy and starts chanting Latin. But this doesn't really faze Guy. He grabs Dean by the throat. Sam comes to and tells Becky to run. Creep in the hoodie starts choking Sam with creepy hand gestures.
Suddenly Dean's knife is thrust through creep in the hoodie's chest. Becky just straight up stabbed him! Sam takes the knife out and passes it to Dean who holds it up to Guy's throat. Power shift!
Dean asks how many deals Guy's got in this town. Guy's got 15. Dean tells him to call them off or he'll cut his own loophole in Guy's throat.
Suddenly Guy notices someone behind Dean and doesn't look to pleased about it.
It's Crowley! Dean gets behind Guy and continues to hold him at knife point. Crowley makes a funny.
Dean tells Crowley he'll slit Guy's throat. Crowley doesn't think Dean should let Guy off that easily. Guy's all "whaaaaaa?"
Crowley's not happy about Guy breaking the rules. If they turn into a bunch of cheating cheaters who cheat then who would wanna make a deal with them?
Crowley tells Dean to hand over Guy. He'll cancel every deal Guy made and he'll make an example of him to boot.
Sam has a hard time believing Crowley will do this out of the kindness of his heart. Crowley asks them if they find it odd that they haven't encountered a demon lately. It's because he's told the demons to stay clear of the Winchesters. Crowley's no fan of the leviathan and thus is all for Sam and Dean killing them all. He'll stay out of it.
Dean tells Crowley to rip up the contracts first. Crowley snaps his fingers and the deed is done. Dean hands over Guy.
Crowley takes him and splits.
Garth finally comes to and asks what he missed. Dean throws his hands in the air.
Again with the commercials.

Sam signs an annulment. Becky says it wasn't all bad, right? Sam concedes that she did save his life but she also tricked him into marrying her and then drugged him and tied him to a bed Misery-style. Becky signs the annulment too and has a sad. Sam feels bad and tells her that she's not a loser and someday she'll find the right guy for her. No elixirs required.
Garth looks betwixt by Becky. Dean tells him no.
The boys leave.
Sam and Dean bid farewell to Garth. Garth bear hugs Dean and then leaves. i hope we'll get to see him again. Dean and Sam bust each others balls for their various predicaments in this episode. Sam apologizes for saying he didn't need Dean when he was all doped up on Becky-lovin.
But Dean says he was right. Sam doesn't really need Dean, he's a grown up and maybe it's time Dean started treating him like one. Then he calls Sam a hippie.
Sam tells Dean that it might be nice now that he feels like he doesn't have to watch over Sam, he can finally concentrate on taking care of himself.
Dean doesn't look to excited by this prospect.
Stolen Dodge out.

Next time on Supernatural...
It's time to hunt the infamous Jersey Devil. No, not Snooki.

P.S. Sam and Dean are up for two People's Choice Awards!!! Vote for them here.

The Super Nostalgic Book Flashback Challenge: Round 11 Part 2 Reviews

Time to head back to Stoneybrook to catch up with our favorite babysitters! Are you ready? Here we go.....

EvilEva reviews...... The Baby-Sitters Club Mystery #5: Mary Anne and the Secret in the  Attic by Ann M. Martin. 

Circa: 1992.

Dissecting The Cover:
Because you can judge a book by its cover!
*OMG! Mary Anne is actually in her attic hidey hole! At least her daddy allowed her to have a flashlight. Mary Anne's lucky she's an only child. If you find a creep named Christopher up there you better haul ass, Mary Anne!

Let's Review:
It's time for Heritage Day in Stoneybrook! Heritage Day is a made up holiday in which we celebrate our ancestors moving to Stoneybrook by making the elementary school students do research papers, write poems, perform skits and other assorted shit. While that sounds like one of the dullest holidays ever to me, the BSC is crazy excited about it. Except sad sack Mary Anne.
Because unlike the rest of the Baby-Sitters Club, Mary Anne's mother died when Mary Anne was just a baby and her dad is super controlling and refuses to tell her anything about her past. And Mary Anne is too much of a sad sack chicken shit to actually woman up and just demand that her dad tell her what she wants to know.
So Mary Anne roots through boxes in the attic to find anything she can about her past. What Mary Anne finds are pics of herself as a baby with two old people she's never seen before and letters written by these old people to her father. Mary Anne finds out that after her mother died of this mystery illness that no one ever names, her father sent her off to live with her mother's parents. So Mary Anne thinks that her dad didn't want her and instead of, i don't know, ASKING HIM ABOUT IT, Mary Anne mopes around for a week or so.
Then she accidentally picks up the phone while her father's talking to someone on it. That someone is Mary Anne's grandmother! And she wants Mary Anne back! But Mary Anne's father didn't have that hidey hole in the attic where he stores Mary Anne when she's not baby-sitting built for nothing! So G-Maw can suck it! Mary Anne gets super emotional as she is wont to do. But again, doesn't confront her dad.
Meanwhile, the BSC decide to make a booth for Heritage Day. They're gonna make giant cardboard cutouts of famous Stoneybrookians and take people's pictures with them and give the proceeds to the historical society. Cos the BSC are such fucking goody-goodies.
Well while making the cutouts, at Mary Anne's house natch, they spill paint and Logan is suddenly topless and music is blaring and it's all just a big ol' mess. Then the doorbell rings! Mary Anne answers it and thinks the lady is a social worker sent by her evil G-Maw to prove that Mary Anne's dad is an unfit parent! Oh noes! Loud music, a messy household, and a shirtless 13 year old boy in the house will not make a good case for Mary Anne's dad!
Mary Anne worries about this now. Again, not telling her dad any of her thoughts or fears.
Finally it's Heritage Day! And seeing everyone else's non-jacked up family's proudly displaying their non-jacked up family trees, Mary Anne finally breaks down and tells her dad that she snooped through the boxes in the attic. She finally tells him that she feels like a part of her is missing cos he never talks about her mom or their past. 
So Mary Anne's dad finally explains all the shizz about her grandparents. When her mother died, Mary Anne's dad sent her to live with her grandparents so he could get his shit together. Then when he finally got his shit together he immediately wanted her back but the grandparents weren't sure he was ready. So they kinda fought over Mary Anne and her dad won. And since her grandparents were kinda douchey, he never let them see her again.
Now her dad is butt hurt because Mary Anne feels incomplete. So he gives her a letter from her mom that he was supposed to give her on her 16th birthday. 
Mary Anne's happy but still upset that she's gonna be shipped off to live with her evil grandmother that she doesn't even know. 
Her dad explains that her G-Maw doesn't want custody. She just wants Mary Anne to visit. 
But what about the social worker?
Well it wasn't a social worker at all. It was just a census taker wanting to know how many people lived in their house! Oh how stupid Mary Anne feels! 
But she would like to visit her G-Maw now that she knows she's not an evil old lady that wants to kidnap her. 
So Mary Anne heads to Iowa and writes the most boring correspondence EVER. But we wouldn't expect anything less from sad sack Mary Anne!

Say Whaaat!?:
And the most ridiculous line in the entire book goes to...
We'll just give it to Ann M. Martin herself for this racy nugget of inappropriateness:
Logan got the worst of it: his shirt was nearly covered with paint. "This is ridiculous," he said. "Every time I move, I get more paint on me." He unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off.
"Woo!" said Kristy.
What are you Wooing for Kristy? We all know you wish it was Shannon taking off her shirt.

EvilEva reviews...... The Baby-Sitters Club Mystery #11: Claudia and the Mystery of the Museum by Ann M. Martin.
Circa: 1993.

Dissecting The Cover:
*Huh. Claudia's actually dressed like a semi-normal human being today.
*What is up with that suit of armor? That must have been a very ill-shaped knight. His legs are teeny tiny and his arms nearly reach the floor. 
*That security guard doesn't look too concerned with the broken display case. He looks mad because Claudia's outfit isn't nearly "wild" enough.
* The tagline reads:

What kind of crook would steal art?
Um, an art thief?

Let's Review:
Claudia's super excited about the new museum in Stoneybrook! It'll be a great place to take her baby-sitting charges, plus it has some pieces by her fave sculptor, Don Newman. 
So Claudia rounds up some art-loving kids and takes them to the museum. While they're there the museum is robbed! Someone steals ancient coins! 
Because of her Nancy Drew obsession (my girl!) Claudia thinks she can totes solve this mystery. She starts by looking at museum-goers as suspects. There's a Brownie troupe, a custodian, a few families and a questionable guy with one blue eye and one green eye. Clearly that's the sign of the devil. So this guy must be the culprit. 
Claud tells the rest of the BSC about the robbery and how she wants to solve the case. 
The BSC puzzles til their puzzlers are sore. When suddenly Mallory has a flash of genius! Whoever stole the coins must have hidden them somewhere in the museum because shortly after the alarm bells went off everyone was patted down. The girls decide to head back to the museum to look for clues. Claudia sees the man with one blue eye and one green eye again! The BSC tails him throughout the museum until he gets annoyed and leaves. The girls think it's very suspicious that this guy got all annoyed that a group of girls were following him around while he tried to enjoy the art. So blue eye/green eye is definitely a suspect. 
Claudia goes back to the museum again to see the Don Newman exhibit. Stacey goes with. 
While molesting one of Don Newman's sculptures, Claudia gets the feeling that it might be a fake. So she marches to the curator's office to tell him so. The curator thinks Claudia's full of shit but humors her by checking the sculpture. He seems to think it's fine. Claudia doesn't. The curator acts kinda douchey. So now he's bumped blue eye/green eye to suspect #2 and taken his place as suspect numero uno. 
And since he was being so douchetastic and Claudia completely doesn't trust him anymore, she swipes one of his resumes which he just so happens to have lying about on his desk. 
So the girls hit the library to research the no good curator and find out that there have been multiple robberies at various museums he's worked at.
And Claudia can't get the sculpture out of her head so she dials up information and gets Don Newman's home number. She calls and tells him that she thinks his art may be a fake. Don Newman is the opposite of douchetastic and invites Claudia to a fancy soiree at the museum which he'll also be attending. He tells her they can check on the piece together. Don Newman is being super nice to Claudia. EvilEva wonders if Chris Hanson needs to be summoned.
So Claudia dons a fancy kimono and attends the fancy formal event. She meets up with Don and they go to check out his sculpture. But it's gone! It's been packed up and ready to ship to his next show. So Claud and Don head to the storage room. Before they can get inside a custodian walks up. So they hide. The custodian goes into the storage room, finds the sculpture and pulls the stolen coins from a hidden compartment inside the sculpture and drops them in his mop bucket. Don tackles the custodian and blue eye/green eye tackles Don! Turns out blue eye/green eye is a special agent that deals with art thievery! And the curator was hired for his special robbery-prevention skills! And the custodian was gonna sell the coins to a museum in Switzerland! Who are supposed to be neutral!
But Claudia saved the day! Even though it was by dumb lucky and she originally thought the good guys were the thieves!

Say Whaaat!?:
And most ridiculous line in the entire book goes to...
Claudia, for attempting to describe the reason behind Mary Anne's dad's new laid-backness:

Remember I mentioned that Mary Anne's father had loosened up a little? Well, we think it may have had something to do with the fact that he fell in love again with an old high school girlfriend, and then married her.
It also might be because he's getting laid now on a regular basis.

Oh, and also there's this:
Claudia describes why every other Kishi is a piece of shit:

They also wish I would a) stop eating junk food and b) stop reading Nancy Drew books.
Fuck you, Mr. and Mrs. Kishi.

That's all from Stoneybrook for this month. I can't believe that I only have one more round of super book nostalgia to get through before the year is up. *sigh* But don't worry. I plan on revisiting the BSC in a big way next month! Hint: it'll be Super Special! ;)

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

The TBR Back Burner Challenge: Round 11 Reviews

I've gotten somewhat behind in the many series that I'm involved in. So this month will be dedicated to catching up with the girls from Private and The Lying Game.

These reviews are of books that are in a series!
Spoilers ahead!
If you haven't read the first books, you may want to stop here!

EvilEva reviews...... The Lying Game: Never Have I Ever by Sara Shepard.
The games are back. And the stakes are higher than ever. 
Someone murdered Sutton Mercer, and it's up to her long-lost twin sister, Emma to figure out who. But the deeper Emma digs the more suspects she uncovers. And the more danger she finds herself in. 
Because Sutton's killer is still out there and whoever it is knows Emma's little secret. Now Emma must play along or she could be next.

It's been awhile since I read the first book in The Lying Game series so I admit that my memory of Emma, Sutton and Co. is a little hazy. Made hazier still by the fact that I watched the TV series which is nothing like the book. So when starting Never Have I Ever I was very confused because I didn't know if I was remembering what happened in the book or what happened in the show.
So my advice to you would be to skip the show because a) it's not very good and 2) it'll fuck with your memory of the book.
Speaking of the book, let's, well, speak of the book.
Never Have I Ever continues the mystery of who offed Sutton Mercer. Emma, Sutton's long-lost sister, is forced to be Sutton, to pretend that Sutton is still alive and well. But Emma's also trying to piece together who her sister was so that she can figure out what happened to her and who would want her dead.
Unfortch for Emma, it seems that Sutton's amassed a large following of haters, some of which are her own friends. So the suspect list is a very long one.
Luckily Emma has Ethan, the only person in Tucson that knows her true identity.
Emma and Ethan get their Nancy Drew on and while they clear some names, they're still no closer to any resolution. Sutton did a lot of shitty things. She pissed off a lot of people. But who was angry enough to kill her and blackmail her sister? We still don't know.
But there are a few reveals this time around.
We find out the cause of the Twitter Twins beef with Sutton. We get a few flashbacks to Sutton's past. We discover Madeline's dark secret. And we have new suspects that weren't even considered before.
Plus the swoony times between Emma and Ethan are upped for our reading pleasure. Never has a game of Marco Polo been rife with such sexual tension!
The mystery is unraveling slowly but steadily. The Lying Game seems to be going the way of its older sister, Pretty Little Liars. Meaning if you want a problem-solved-by-the-final-page book you're barking up the wrong tree with this series. But if you're like me and don't mind the twists and turns and cliffhangers being spread out through several books, then I would advise that you catch up with The Lying Game. Cos nobody does a fun, soapy, drama-filled whodunit quite like Sara Shepard!

The Scale of Judgment says...... 4.

EvilEva reviews...... Private: Vengeance by Kate Brian.

A lot has happened to Reed Brennan in the past two years. But this year she'd like to put the past behind her. Reed wants to enjoy the present and look forward to the future.
Because life is short. So Reed is ready to do something big.
She wants to rebuild Billings!
She has the money and draws up the plans and soon enough Billings is on its way to being restored to its former glory. 
But someone wants to stop the process of revamping Billings---permanently. And they'll go to dangerous lengths to make sure Reed doesn't get what she wants.

This is the final book in the Private series. And while I'm sad to see it go, I do think it's time. There are only so many times that a person can narrowly escape murder by various individuals before it gets a little ridick. 
That being said, surprise surprise, someone's trying to kill Reed- AGAIN! This is book 14 and I'm surprised that Reed still has any friends at this point. I think I'd be like "no offense, girl, you're great and all but I'd kinda like to make it to senior year so... see ya." And then you'd see a me-shaped hole in her dormroom door.
Anyway, Reed is still public enemy number one for Eatson's resident psychotics. She's still super obsessed with Billings. And she's a little emotional because most of her friends, including that hot toddy Josh, will be graduating this year. But mostly she's just obsessed with Billings. This is something that's always bugged me about Reed. Her lack of interest for anything not Billings related. 
I mean, it's like she would choose this inanimate nothing over everything else in her life. To me it seems like she prefers the idea of this legendary sisterhood over the actual sisters of said sisterhood. 
Because really Reed hardly ever hangs out with any of the girls. She's always off doing some sort of Billings bullshit. It makes me think that even after Reed graduates she'll never leave Billings. She'll be the Mrs. Rochester of Easton.
So that can be frustrating to read. Especially when you know that Reed's super fine boyfriend, Josh is being left unattended and uncared for. If it were me I'd say fuck Billings and I'd go rock Josh's world in the Art Cemetery. But that's just me. 
Anyway, as a final book, Vengeance, took the Private series out with a "meh." It could've been better. There were a few parts that seemed rushed and some parts that just seemed thrown in.
I hate saying that because I really liked this series. The first books, I was so totes all in. 
Then there was that stranded on a deserted island thing. And that whole "hey we're descended from witches" thing. And after awhile I just got tired of jumping that shark, knowwhati'msayin'? 
So I was a little disappointed that this is how it all ends. I wish the series could've gone out with a bang. But--- meh. 

The Scale of Judgment says...... 3.

Monday, November 21, 2011

The Super Nostalgic Book Flashback Challenge: Round 11 Part 1 Reviews

Have y'all been desperately missing the antics of Karen Brewer, little sister to the bossiest, least likable member of The Baby-Sitters Club? Yeah me neither. But let's check in with her annoying ass anyway.

EvilEva reviews...... Baby-Sitters Little Sister #1: Karen's Witch by Ann M. Martin.
Circa: 1988.

Dissecting The Cover:
Because you can judge a book by its cover!
* Karen is wearing a truly fulgy sweater and jeans that look about two sizes too long. Isn't your dad a millionaire? I know he is because it's mention ALL THE TIME in The Baby-Sitters Club series.
* Karen's face kinda looks like that kid's from Jerry Maguire. Also it looks like it may weigh more than 8 pounds.  
* She's spying on her neighbor whom she thinks is a witch. But Mrs. Porter is just old. And Karen is just stupid.
* Mrs. Porter's house is fucking sweet! Except for its close proximity to Karen's house. Only drawback.
* The tagline reads:
Is Karen's next-door neighbor a witch?
No, but Karen is an idiot.

Let's Review:
Karen Brewer is a six year old (almost seven year old!) busybody that's always all up in everyone else's Kool-Aid. She's also a close-minded dumbass who thinks her next door neighbor, Mrs. Porter is a witch just because she wears black and has white hair and owns a black cat and an herb garden.
One night after reading witch stories, Karen swears she sees Mrs. Porter, whom she's stupidly dubbed Morbidda Destiny, fly from the second floor window of her house on a broomstick. Karen is, of course, full of doo doo. 
So she decides to spy on The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny with her bff, Hannie. The girls overhear The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny talking to herself while gardening. She says something about an "important meeting," and "company coming," and "midnight." So Karen's dumb ass thinks The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny is planning a witches meeting at midnight. Well Karen won't stand for this bullshizz so she and Hannie go and filch some of The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny's herbs from her garden and decide to make up their own spell to ward off the witches so that they can save their neighborhood. Save their neighborhood from what, I don't know. 
Anyway, they place the herbs in their pockets and march up to The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny's door. The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny is surprised to see them since I would assume that she hates them and thus never invites them over to her house. But, be that as it may, The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny lets the girls in. Bad move, The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny. 
Karen goes into the room where all the "witches" have gathered and she calls them out on their witchy ways and tells them that if they try to ruin her neighborhood then she will fucking bury them. And by fucking bury them she means tattle on them to her super rich daddy. Then Hannie starts crying. 
Karen's grandmother, who happens to be friends with The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny, explains to Karen that this isn't a witch meeting, it's a garden club meeting. Grams makes the girls apologize for being so stupid and then escorts them off of the property. 
Karen's taken home and forced to explain to her parents that she spied on their neighbor and falsely accused her and all her friends of being evil witches and warlocks. But Karen doesn't get in much trouble cos she was oh so nobly trying to save the neighborhood. From gardeners. 
But her parents do make her write an apology letter to The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny. And that's all for her punishment. Even though she totes still thinks The Stupidly Dubbed Morbidda Destiny is a witch. 
So Karen basically learned......... um, nothing. 

Say Whaaat!?!:
And the most ridiculous line in the entire book goes to...
Karen, natch. For this:
"Hey!" I exclaimed. "Let's pretend we're witches. Wouldn't that be fun?"
Uh, bitch, this whole time you've been a huge a-hole about Mrs. Porter maybe being a witch and now you wanna pretend to be one?!?!? So I guess the only acceptable way to be a witch is if you're Karen. What a bitch!

EvilEva reviews...... Baby-Sitters Little Sister #3: Karen's Worst Day by Ann M. Martin.
Circa: 1989.

Dissecting The Cover:
*Aw, Boo Boo the cat looks like a neighborhood cat that used to take up residence in our backyard all the time. I mean, except for the Hitler mustache. 
* Karen looks so stupid on this cover. She doesn't look like she's upset that Boo Boo tree-ed himself just to get away from her. She looks like someone just beamed her upside the head with a pine cone. Oh how I wish that someone was me.
* Karen has a lot of signatures on her cast. I find it hard to believe that that many people like Karen enough to want to sign her cast. Although, truth be told, I've always wanted to sign someone's cast:
Way to go, dumbass!
Karen's would be the perfect cast to sign that way!

Let's Review:
Karen is having a really bad day. In fact it's her Worst Day EVER! In fact it may be the Worst Day of anyone's life Ever EVER! Karen is in no way overdramatizing the horribleness of this day. I mean, she started the day waking up from a nightmare! Then she realizes that she forgot her new fave jeans with the zippers up the sides at her mom's house!
Then Andrew gets the last of the Crunch-O's cereal and the prize! And even when Elizabeth tries to help make Karen less bitchy by giving her a new box of Crunch-O's, Karen is devastated to find that the prize pack is EMPTY! I mean, who cares that there are starving non-bitchy children in Africa that would totally take that cereal even without a prize.
So Karen decides to turn her day around by watching some hilarious Mr. Ed reruns. But Mr. Ed's timeslot has been hijacked by some "special program." Probably about those hungry African kids. Man, Karen just cannot catch a break.
But it's still early in the morning so maybe Karen can make herself feel better by playing with Shannon the dog. But Shannon, much like myself, can't be bothered with Karen and her dumbassery. So Karen tries to play with Boo Boo the cat instead. But Boo Boo, much like myself, would rather climb a tree than hang out with Karen. Finally Boo Boo jumps down but still has no interest in playing with Karen.
Meanwhile, Morbidda Destiny is busy minding her own business in her own yard and exclaims "fiddlesticks!" Which Karen, being a complete moron, thinks is a curse. So Karen runs inside.
Then Karen's bff Hannie comes over with her brother and asks if Karen and David Michael would like to ride bikes to Harry's Brook to catch minnows and have a picnic.
Well Karen loses her shit and calls Hannie a toad because she so insensitively asked Karen to ride bikes when she knows good and damn well that Karen can't ride a bike on account of her broken arm. Karen storms back into the house while Hannie, her brother and David Michael pedal off to enjoy a Karen-free afternoon.
Kristy doesn't get off so easily. She's forced to play checkers with Satan. I mean, Karen. But Karen gets pissy when Kristy lets her win so she storms off yet again.
Then even more bad shit happens.
Karen's stuffed cat gets ripped, there's no more cherry Italian ice on Mr. Tastee's ice cream truck and Andrew got a package and Karen didn't so she acts like an even bigger d-bag to him since he can totally control when people mail shit to him.
But finally at dinnertime, things start turning around. Karen's family discuss their own horrible days and Karen realizes that as far as bad days go she would hold the record for the most shitious things happening to a person in one day! So Karen is a winner!  
Then things get Even Better after dinner cos Charlie and Sam take Karen to go get ice cream. And the ice cream parlor actually has exactly what Karen wants. And Charlie's friends thought Karen was 26 and that she was Charlie's girlfriend which delights Karen to no end because she doesn't understand how you're not supposed to date your stepbrother especially if you're 10 years older than him.
Anyway, they go home and Karen apologizes to all the people who felt her wrath today. And everyone accepts her apology because you don't wanna be on Karen's shit list. The end!

Say Whaaat!?!:
And the most ridiculous line in the entire book goes to...
Karen, for her explanation of why she's going to read Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day to her brother Andrew:
"Do you want me to read it to you?" If I read it, you might understand how I felt. And why I yelled at you."
Uh, you yelled at him because you're a jackass that can't be happy for anyone else.

Well y'all, it's official--- No more Karen Brewer in 2011!!! Yay!!! We survived!!! Will we be as lucky in 2012? We'll just have to wait and see. ;) 

Monday, November 14, 2011

EvilEva's Trailer Park Presents: Books Into Movies For All Ages!!!

There seems to be Books Into Movies overload coming our way. And there also seems to be a little something something for everyone. So i've compiled a little listy-poo for you guys starting with some kid-lit, Dr. Seuss awesomeness and ending with THE OFFICIAL TRAILER FOR THE HUNGER GAMES!!!

First up we have The Lorax which is of course based on the book of the same name written by the best children's book author EVER, Dr. Seuss! . The movie stars the vocal talents of Zac Efron, Taylor Swift, Ed Helms, Betty White and little Danny Devito as the lorax. It's set to hit theaters on March 2nd, 2012. 

Next up, more kid-lit! This one's not headed for the big screen but the small. SyFy is at it again, taking a beloved classic (previously Alice in Wonderland and The Wizard of Oz) and turning it into a SyFy Original Movie Event. This time they're taking on Peter Pan and making a prequel titled Neverland. The trailer tells us that this is before Peter met Wendy, before the boys were lost and before Hook became Captain. So it sounds like a pretty interesting premise. The stars of this miniseries are Charlie Rowe, Rhys Ifans, Anna Friel, and Keira Knightley as the voice of Tinkerbell. Neverland begins December 4th at 9pm and you can catch the conclusion December 5th at 9pm. 

Keeping with the fairy tale theme, here's the trailer for Snow White and the Huntsman. This one stars Charlize Theron, Kristen Stewart and Chris Hemsworth. It's supposed to be in theaters some time next summer. i gotta say, the graphics look pretty cool. They've even made Kristen Stewart look less like she's about to stick her head in an oven. God, CGI is such a wonder, huh?

So this isn't based on a book but the main character, played by Charlize Theron, is a young adult author. Which i think is pretty cool cos when are our folks ever represented in anything?! Not that the character that Mizz Theron is playing seems to be doing real YA authors any justice. She seems like a ginormous mess of a person.
Anyhooties, Patrick Wilson and Patton Oswalt also start in this flick which comes out in theaters December 9th.

i posted a trailer for Girl With The Dragon Tattoo a while back but this one is more "movie trailer" less "movie clips coupled with Euro dance music." So if you haven't read the books, this trailer will give you more insight into what you can expect from the movie. It stars Daniel Craig and Rooney Mara. You can catch it in theaters starting December 21st.   

And now the biggest of all bigs:

Ok, i don't know about y'all but i totally fangirled it out while watching this!!! In my opinion this movie is going to be awesome!!! i think the official trailer is totally rad and i think we'll all be eating our hats when March comes. i hope so. i hope that we were all totes wrong this whole time that we've been bitching and moaning about certain casting choices. Maybe i'm being a little too optimistic here. But i'm really hoping for a little more Harry Potter a little less Twilight. Agree?

So what do you guys think? Which movies are you super excited to see? Sound off in the comments section.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Supernatural Shakedown: Season 7 Episode 7 OR Watch Your Back, Simon Baker

It's Friday night. It's 9 o clock. So sit your Ass-butt down and lets watch some Supernatural!

Episode #7: The Mentalists.
Previously on Supernatural...
Bobby finally figured out a way to kill the leviathan--- douse them in sodium borate, chop off the head and bury the head and the body in separate locations. Sam learned that Dean killed Amy. And was totes upset about it. So Sam takes off on his own. We finally meet the leviathan big bad. Crowley pops back in wanting to work with him but Big Bad is so not into demons and declines Crowley's proposal. Big Bad is still all about destroying the Winchesters though.

Seance! A psychic is giving a reading to a very enthusiastic lady and a very unimpressed man. The enthusiastic lady and the psychic use a Ouija board to contact someone named Uncle Danny. Unimpressed man wants to know about some important papers. The psychic tells him to Ouija with her. The lights start flickering. The psychic seems a little weirded out. Which is weird since she's a psychic and should be used to flickering lights by now one would think.  
The fire in the fireplace flames higher. The Ouija planchette starts moving by itself. The psychic and the enthusiastic lady get Freezing Cold Ghost Breath. Suddenly the planchette launches off the table and straight through the psychic's neck.
Exploding black goo. Supernatural logo. Showtime!

Dean checks his phone but has no new messages. Then he steals an ugly Dodge. After Dean hotwires the car, the radio turns on and the DJ says that psychics are dying in a town called Lily Dale which is supposedly the most psychic place in America. Well this sounds right up our alley. So Dean heads off to Lily Dale.
Lily Dale! And Suits of Sexiness! Dean checks out the planchette-necked psychic's place. He finds buttons and switches on the psychic's chair and table which was what caused the wind and knocking noises from the psychic reading. So planchette-necked psychic is a big phony.
Dean leaves and walks down a street that's full of psychic shops and windchimes. He stops at Good Graces Cafe. This place is so not Dean. Then he hears Sam's voice, ordering coffee. Dean goes over and joins Sam. Dean starts talking about the case but Sam's giving the silent treatment. Dean says since they're both there they might as well work together. Sam agrees.
A lady walks in and she starts freaking out because she thinks Sam and Dean are the crazy killers that their leviathan doppelgangers were in last weeks episode. But they tell her they're not those Evil Winchesters. She starts babbling about their gentle energies or some shit and a man comes up and stops her, telling her that the boys are so clearly FBI. He hands Sam his business card. He's Nikolai and he's a world famous spoon bender. What a cowink, so am i. Not because i have impressive mind powers but because most spoons are easy to bend.
Anyhoosies, he picks up Sam's spoon and talks about harnessing the power of his mind. Then he and the lady leave.
Sam shares his case files with Dean. The first dead psychic was brained to death by her own crystal ball. Sam shows Dean a picture of the next victim, the planchette-necked lady. Her name was Goldy. The boys notice that she has on the same necklace in her picture as the first psychic. So this may be a cursed object case. The boys decide to head to over to Goldy's next of kin who is also a psychic. Sam goes to stir sugar in his coffee and his spoon bends. Sam makes a funny.
Next of kin's house! Suits of Sexiness continue!!! Goldy's next of kin is Melanie, her granddaughter. She's being comforted by a friend. The friend leaves. Melanie invites the boys in. She tells them she's not really psychic she just reads body language. Then she totally nails the bros current effed up sitch. Dean and Mel flirt a little bit. Sam asks her about the necklace. She says all of her grandmother's stuff was sent to a place called The Emporium.
The Emporium! Which looks like a dump. Dean and Sam stroll in. They ask the guy at the counter (who's name is Jimmy Tomorrow.) about the necklace. He tries to charge them waaaay too much for it. So Sam and Dean flash their badges and take the necklace as "evidence." Jimmy gives Sam a reading. He tells Sam a lose weighs heavily on him. Then he hands Sam his card in case Sam would like a private reading. Sam pockets the card and the boys leave.
Sam looks over the necklace and discovers it's a fake. So whatever is killing mediums is still out there.
Nikolai's house! He spreads cutlery out on his coffee table and he looks a little too excited about it if you know what i mean. He picks up a fork and starts stroking it (um, ewww.) He bends the fork. It straightens back up. All of his cutlery is standing at attention on the table. Nikolai gets Freezing Cold Ghost Breath. He starts levitating and is thrown into his upward-pointing cutlery. He bleeds like a mother.
Here's a commercial.

Nikolai's house! Sam and Dean enter in their Suits of Sexiness!!! Dean makes a funny. Sam questions the sheriff. He tells the bros that he's had 36 calls claiming they know what happened to Nikolai. The popular theories are a ghost and an ogre that only attacks Russians. He tells them that apparently Nikolai had a vision of his own death, cutlery and all.
Dean's cell rings. It's Melanie.
Melanie's house! She asks if it's true that Nikolai had a vision of his own death. Dean tells her yes. She tells them that her grandma left her a message saying that she had a vision of her own death at the seance. She tells them that her grandma said the room was freezing. It's ghosts, y'all! Dean tells Melanie that there's fake whoo-whoo crap and real whoo-whoo crap. And this is most definitely of the real whoo-whoo crap. He tells Melanie that he and Sam aren't actually FBI either. Melanie needs a drink.
The boys leave. It seems that this town full of psychics could be in real trouble. Sam says they need to split up because it'll be faster that. Sam walks away. Dean leaves in his stolen Dodge.
Melanie's hugging friend! She's a psychic too. She makes her scratch my reading dim bones, mon. Oh and she's apparently Jamaican now. She gives a reading to a woman, then she counts her cash, then has a vision. She's being strangled while a cuckoo clock goes off.
Her doorbell rings. It's Dean and Melanie. Mel's Psychic Friend tells them about her death vision. Dean asks where exactly in the room did she have this vision. She leads them over to the cash box. Dean inspects the spot and notices a hidden camera in a wooden mask on the wall.
They look at the footage from the hidden camera for clues. On the screen there's a woman standing behind Mel's Psychic Friend while she has her vision. Dean tells the girls that no one's having a psychic vision, the ghost is giving them out for some reason. 
Mel's Psychic Friend is understandably freaked cos she's next. But in her vision she noticed that the clock said it was 2 AM when she was being choked out which gives us a little time to solve this mystery. Dean asks the girls if they've seen the woman ghost before. Melanie says she's seen her in a picture in the psychic museum. 
Psychic Museum! Dean and Sam go on the guided tour for as long as they can stand it. They wander over to a wall of pictures. There's a picture of two brothers. The tour guide comes up and tells them it never worked out too well with the sibling acts. Sam asks about the pic of two women. The tour guide says the women in the photo are the Fox sisters. Kate Fox is our ghost. She was very troubled but also a talented psychic. She could foretell people's deaths. The other woman was Kate's sister, Margaret. She was a phony baloney psychic with seemingly no real power. But she took care of her sister. The tour guide tells the bros that the sisters lived and died in Lily Dale. So Sam leaves, wanting to head to the cemetery.
Dean turns to go but the tour guide stops him and asks if he knows an Eleanor or an Ellen. Um, hells yeah he knows an Ellen! Or rather he knew an Ellen. *pour one out*
The tour guide tells Dean that Ellen is concerned about him and she says that "If you don't tell someone how bad it really is, she'll kick your ass from beyond." The tour guide tells Dean he has to trust someone eventually.
Dean joins Sam outside. He decides it's time to have it out with Sam. Dean tells him that since he couldn't kill Amy because of emotional ties and whatnot, Dean did the dirty work for him. Dean says he eventually would've told Sam about killing her but he was concerned about that whole Satan being in Sam's head thing. Then he calls Sam a bitch and walks away.
Cemetery at night! Sam digs up Kate's grave. They pour salt and gasoline over the grave. But Kate's ghost comes out of nowhere and shoves Sam. She wants them to listen to her. Dean tries to flick his Bic but it doesn't catch. Sam lights a match and tosses it in Kate's grave. Her ghost goes up in flames.
Diner! Melanie's on the phone with Dean. He tells her that they've taken care of the ghost. Mel's Psychic Friend is relieved but still shaken. So Melanie offers for her to stay at her house for a few days. Mel's Psychic Friend greatly accepts.
Mel's Psychic Friend's house! She's getting her stuff together. The clock cuckoo's. Vision montage! A fire in Mel's Psychic Friend's fireplace blazes up. Mel's Psychic Friend tells Melanie to call Dean and Sam back.
Mel calls Dean and tells him it's not over. She asks what to do. Sam takes the phone from Dean and tells Melanie to get to the kitchen. Mel's Psychic Friend goes to follow but when she turns around Margaret's ghost is all up in her business.
Sam tells Mel to get salt. Margaret starts strangling Mel's Psychic Friend. Melanie runs for some salt. She gets it and throws is at Margaret. Margaret disappears but reappears again. Sam tells them to get iron. The girls stand back to back with fireplace pokers as weapons. Suddenly a dresser shoots across the room knocking Melanie against a wall. Mel falls to the floor. Mel's Psychic Friend goes to check on her but Margaret approaches behind her! Margaret grabs Mel's Psychic Friend. As an aside, Mel's Psychic Friend was apparently named Camille. Not that we'll be using her name again cos she's totes dead now.
Commercial time.

Outside Camille's! (i stand corrected about using her name.) Dean and Sam pull up. Mel runs out and into Dean's arms. 
Next day! Turns out Kate was just trying to warn the psychics about her totally cray cray sister. Melanie comes downstairs and asks the guys to leave. Sam tells her that Margaret is still out there and asks if there's anything Melanie remembers about her that stood out. Melanie tells them it seemed like Margaret was all about Camille. And she also really seemed to enjoy killing her. 
Cemetery during the day! Dean digs up Margaret's grave. But there are no bones in it! 
The boys head back to the car. Dean throws the shovel in the trunk and pulls out a flier for the psychic festival. All the headliners are dead. Cowinky-dink? i think not. 
Back to Mel's! Dean shows her the flier. She tells them that after Nikolai got forked they asked Camille to take his spot. Dean asks who they would have asked to fill in for her G-Maw. Melanie says probably her. Rut row. 
The Emporium! Sam gives Jimmy Tomorrow The Stupidly Named Emporium Owner a list of things someone would use for a ghost-binding spell and asks if anyone came in wanting said items. Jimmy checks his receipt books and finds a match. Someone payed with a credit card. He gives Sam the address. Sam hauls ass. 
Melanie's house! Dean makes a Salt Circle of Protection around them and preps for Margaret's arrival. 
Back to Sam. He finds the address and busts in. Jimmy Tomorrow has lead Sam to a whoo-whoo lamaze class. Sam realizes that he's been duped. He realizes that Jimmy Tomorrow is the real culprit. He calls Dean with the news and heads over to find Margaret's bones. 
Melanie's house! Margaret stands at the window.
Sam goes back to the Emporium but it's locked up. He takes out Jimmy's card, It's got his home address on it which is only a few doors down from the shop. Sam enters Jimmy's house. He finds an alter with a skull in the center of it. A trigger clicks. Jimmy Tomorrow is behind Sam! With a gun! 
More commercials.

Jimmy Tomorrow tells Sam to put the skull down. Sam says alright. He makes like he's going to do just that but pulls some quick move and disarms Jimmy.
Mel's! Margaret is gone for the moment. But suddenly the windows shatter.
Jimmy's! Sam knocks over the alter. Jimmy says it doesn't matter. Margaret helps him because she wants to.
Mel's! Dean grabs his gun. The wind has fucked up the Salt Circle of Protection. Dean tells Melanie to grab the salt. Margaret's behind Dean. Melanie yells out to warn him. Margaret blasts him across the room and turns to Mel. 
Jimmy's! Jimmy explains that he and Margaret are the same. They're the "real thing" but sometimes the real thing isn't pretty or entertaining enough.
Mel's! Margaret advances on Melanie. Dean shoots Margaret and she dissipates. 
Jimmy's! Jimmy's mad cos he's a real deal psychic but no one would listen to him or take him seriously. 
Mel's! Melanie draws a line of salt between her and Margaret. Dean aims his gun at Margaret.
Jimmy's! Jimmy tells Sam that Margaret likes to kill for him. Then he magically takes the gun from Sam!
Mel's! Margaret busts up the floors with her mind magic. Which splits the salt line. Dean shoots her again. She dissipates again.
Jimmy's! Sam asks Jimmy where the rest of Margaret's bones are. Jimmy doesn't answer but not so subtly shuffles in front of an open door. 
Mel's! Margaret reappears. And Dean's outta ammo.
Jimmy's! Sam tries talking some sense into Jimmy. He tells him that those people didn't deserve to die. But Jimmy's all butt hurt cos he's living in squalor cos unlike those other psychics, he can't put on a decent show. Have you tried simply taking acting lessons? i'd try that before i raised up a witch, bound her and started using her to kill off my competition. But that's just me.
Sam asks if the bones are in the bedroom. Jimmy says no although they so clearly are. Jimmy fires the gun but it doesn't hit Sam. Jimmy glances back at the room containing the bones, while his back is turned, Sam pulls a gun from behind his back and shoots Jimmy.
Mel's! Margaret continues kicking Dean's ass.
Jimmy's! Sam finds the bones in Jimmy's bed. Ew.
Mel's! Margaret's done with Dean for the moment so she moves on to Melanie and starts strangling her.
Jimmy's! Sam lights the bones up.
Mel's! Margaret flames out.
Commercial time once more.

Cafe! Sam tells Dean about the bones being in Jimmy's bed. Dean makes a funny. Mel enters the cafe. Sam leaves so Dean and Melanie can get their flirt on. Melanie thanks Dean for saving her from the ghost. She also came to tell Dean goodbye since she figures that he won't wanna stick around. Dean says you never know, it's not like you can tell the future. Melanie pretends to read Dean's palm. She gives him an eight ball answer. i'm really liking Dean and Melanie together, guys.
Dean meets Sam outside. Sam is loading up his stuff in Dean's stolen car. He tells Dean that he figures they can just take one car. Sam admits that Dean was right about Amy. If she had been just some monster and not a friend Sam probably would've done the same thing as Dean. But Sam is concerned for Dean's well being what with his excessive drinking and all. He wants Dean to be honest with him. So Dean tells Sam that he didn't trust Amy and that he's had a hard time trusting anyone since Cass. Dean says he's been acting drinky and such because he doesn't like lying to Sam. They have a heart to heart and make several funnies and leave Lily Dale.

Next time on Supernatural...
Sam...... is....... GETTING MARRIED!?!?!?!?!? What the hell indeed, Dean. This better not be for realsies, y'all. i mean, who the fuck could he possibly be marrying? i'm here.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

The TBR Back Burner Challenge Round 10 Reviews

This month I decided to read the two books from my TBR pile that seem to be constantly mocking the ever-loving shizz outta me. That would be Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins and The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness.
It seems to me like all other book bloggers (and perhaps every other person on the face of the planet) have read and hyped up these books. So now I'll FINALLY know what the big friggin deal is! Hooray!

EvilEva reviews...... Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins. 

Anna Oliphant is perfectly content living in Atlanta, attending Clairemont High with her bestie Bridge, and crushing on her hottie coworker Toph.
But for Anna's senior year her Nicholas Sparks-esque father decides to uproot her from everything she knows and loves and ship her off to a boarding school in Paris. Not that Paris isn't awesome. It's just not home.
Anna doesn't know anyone, she certainly doesn't know her way around and she barely even speaks the language! So senior year could possibly be super disastrous.
But thanks to the kindness of Anna's dorm neighbor, Meredith, she's welcomed into a little group of friends. Which includes the very handsome Etienne St. Clair.
St. Clair is sweet, confident, funny, charming, gorgeous and he has an accent! And a girlfriend. Not a problem. Anna's fine with simply being St. Clair's best friend. Until she starts having Feelings that suggest she'd really like to be Something More.
What's an unsupervised lovestruck girl in Paris to do?

Holy friggin sexy swoon, Batman! This book is like falling in love for the first time. Not a crush. Not lust. Full-on knee-weakening, palm-sweating, pit-in-the-stomach L-O-V-E! Stephanie Perkins knows what she's doing, y'all!
Now I know why this book has been hyped so much. Cos it totally deserves to be! See, this book has turned me into a gushy schoolgirl. Ok, focus! You have a review to write.
So. Anna is the main character of this tale, obvs. And we love her. She's not "traditionally" beautiful. She's real, she has flaws which, as a person with flaws my damn self, I really appreciated. Plus, girlfriend's got a personality! And interests! She's gaga for movies. In fact, going to the theaters is what pushes Anna out of her dorm room-size comfort zone and inspires her to check out other things that Paris has to offer. I would totally be the same way. Scared of getting lost in a strange city where you don't speak the language. But I know eventually my need for reading material would kick my ass outta my room.
Now onto the sexy business! At the beginning of the book, Anna's really attracted to St. Clair. But then she finds out he's got a girlfriend, so Anna slips into The Friend Zone cos she'd rather be friends with him than nothing at all.
But the more they hang out together, the swoonier things get. And I think that shows what an amazing writer Stephanie Perkins is because there was really very little physical hanky-panky going on in this book. It's all about the stolen glances and accidentally grazing hands and almost kisses. It's all very swoontastic!
Plus the backdrop is Paris so you automatically have to multiply that swoon by 10 in order to properly gage the swoonitude of Anna and the French Kiss.
So sexytimes are important but so is friendship. And Anna is lucky enough to acquire some really great friends. Meredith is the first to befriend Anna. Mer is super sweet, sporty and smart. (She's also got a thang for St. Clair so there's even more drama in this already thick drama stew.)
Then there's Rashmi and Josh, the couple that fight hard and love harder.
And, of course, St. Clair, who I've prattled on about enough already.
I really liked the group dynamic. And as much as I enjoyed the St. Clair swooniness, I wouldn't have minded if the whole group was together more.
We're also introduced to Anna's BFF in Atlanta, Bridge and her BSC (Before St. Clair) crush, Toph. And even more boy drama ensues there!
Plus we get to watch Anna discover the city and herself as she tries to figure out what she wants and who she wants to be.
All in all, Anna and the French Kiss is a really sweet story that you'll totally fall in love with! Or as the French would say *le sigh*

The Scale of Judgment says...... 5!

EvilEva reviews...... The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness.

Todd Hewitt and his trusty dog, Manchee, live in Prentisstown, a strange settlement of New World where men can hear the thoughts of every other man (and animal) in an endless stream of unbearable Noise.
One month shy of becoming a man himself, Todd heads to the swamp on a quest for apples and finds something else entirely. He finds complete silence. And in Prentisstown, silence is dangerous.
Especially when it's in the form of a young girl. Because there have been no women in Prentisstown for years.
So when Mayor Prentiss finds out about Todd's discovery, he begins to form an army, intent on hunting down Todd, his dog and the girl. 
It's up to this small band of unlikely heroes to head for the rumored big city settlement of Haven to warn them and try to prevent another war.

As y'all might know I've gone a little dystopia crazy as of late but I kinda can't help it because all the ones that I've read have been so good. The Knife of Never Letting Go is no different.
It's told from the point of view of Todd, a 12 year old (maybe 14 depending on what calendar you use) who's unhappily happy living in this little town solely inhabited by men whose thoughts he can hear 24/7 with his dog, Manchee, and his guardians Ben and Cillian. Todd has lived in Prentisstown nearly 13 years, minding his own business as best he can and then suddenly one day his whole world is upended. Todd finds a girl and silence, both of which are completely foreign to him. Soon after Todd also finds out that his whole life has pretty much been a big fat lie. It seems even through all the Noise, secrets can still be kept in Prentisstown. Things become unsafe for Todd. The mayor has started an army and as if that isn't bad enough there's also a loony preacher that's out to get him too. So Todd's given a rucksack of things he'll need like a journal written by his mother, food, clothes, a map and a knife and told to make his way to another settlement, one that Todd didn't even know existed.
He takes along his awesome dog, Manchee, who totally reminded me of Dug from Up! and the girl who he learns is named Viola. And together this little band of misfits head out to find help and hopefully answers. 
I can't really tell you too much more because anything else would be spoilery.
I will tell you this though, the first few chapters are a little slow because it's mostly Todd semi-explaining the world around him without giving concrete information like what the heck a spack is and why he's referred to as a "Whirler boy" by some of the local animals.
But the story started to pick up around the fourth chapter and it was fun tagging along on this journey with Todd, Viola and Manchee. I mean, as fun as running for your lives can be. This story is pretty intense. And the kids are younger, so if you're looking for the swoon you found in The Hunger Games and Delirium, you're barking up the wrong tree. The Knife of Never Letting Go is about survival and what it takes to really, truly be brave. And Holy balls with that ending!
If you like your dystopia on the heavy side, with more running and less smooching, then this is the book for you.

The Scale of Judgment says...... 4.

So yay! I FINALLY read these majorly blog-hyped books! Now I know why they were so majorly hyped! If you're still wondering, I would suggest you go ahead and read them so that you too can be in the loop! :)