All The Books-Into-Movies News I've Been Neglecting

Alright.  I know what you're probably thinking: where the hell have you been!?!?  ALL OF THE THINGS have been happening!!!  YA Books-Into-Movies news has been BLOWING UP and you're nowhere to be found!!!!
I know.  I know, you guys.  I've been a VERY bad book nerd and an even worse blogger.
So let's forgive me and get all caught up, kay?

So, because so much has happened lately (and because I've been so damn neglectful,) I decided that what this post really needs is some categorization!  I'll be breaking these trailers down into three separate categories.
I'll start with the tearjerkers.  Or as they'll be known henceforth:

The Weepies:

I imagine that all of you have seen this one already as it has been viewed OVER 17 MILLION TIMES!  But in case you missed it, here is the trailer for the much-talked-about, uber-hyped The Fault in Our Stars.  Check it:  



Are the tears flowing yet?  If that sob-fest of a trailer wasn't enough for you, be sure to check out this week's issue of Entertainment Weekly because it's dominated by the stars, Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort.  (I gotta admit, the photos of the two are pretty darn adorbs.)

 
I've also gotta admit that while I'm excited to see this movie, my excitement has basically nothing to do with either of these kids.  I'm in it for the Sam Merlotte

and the Birbigs!

The movie will be hitting theaters next month.  June 6th, to be exact.  So you've got plenty of time to pick out your opening day outfit!  This shirt from Hot Topic is my current fave.  Or you can show love for your book boyfriend with this one from My Tee Spot.  Or maybe this simple little number from Barnes and Noble is more your style.

And if you thought TFIOS was the only Weepie headed your way, you were very, very wrong.  Another life-obliteratingly sad YA book has recently been made into a movie and will be making its way to a theater near you (and making you openly weep at said theater) August 22nd.  I'm talking about Gayle Forman's beautifully written masterpiece, If I Stay. 
Break out the tissues while you check out the trailer:



It's been sooooo long since I read this book that I've more or less forgotten most of the specifics, but what I DO remember is that I LOVED it!  It immediately put Gayle Forman on my insta-buy author list.  And just watching the trailer makes me want to go back and read it all over again!

And speaking of Chloe Grace Moretz, not only will she be playing Mia in If I Stay, she'll also be kicking ass and taking names as Cassie in the film adaptation of Rick Yancey's The 5th Wave!  I'm excited yet terrified that they decided to make this book into a movie.  I loved the book and can't wait to read the sequel (The Infinite Sea!  Out September 16th!  Dammit! That's too far away!) so I'm really hoping they don't fuck this one up.  Ya hear me, Sony Pictures!?   

Ok, let's move on to our second category:     

The Dystopias:

Because it's like, a law now that all YA dystopian novels MUST be made into movies.  It's called "The Hunger Games Effect."

Anyhoozle, the first trailer is for The Maze Runner, a dystopian series by James Dashner.  I've got this book TBR-ing on my bookshelf right now, so I haven't actually read it yet but, I gotta admit, the trailer has my interest piqued.  I'll have to read it soon because the movie hits theaters September 19th and a true book nerd ALWAYS reads the book FIRST!     




Next up is the trailer for The Giver, a Newbery Medal Award winning book all the way from the 90s written by Lois Lowry.  The movie doesn't come out until August 15th but already people are getting super pissy about it. 
This is another book I haven't read yet so I'm, personally, not all up in arms but other people are having all kinds of shit fits all over the internet about this movie for one reason or another.  After giving their IMDb page a gander, the only things I see wrong with the movie so far are:
A.  It has Katie Holmes in it.  And, let's be honest, homegirl hasn't been the same since Tom Cruise abducted her.
and B.  It has Taylor Swift in it.  And, let's be honest, her pie-eyed, gee-golly-willikers, bullshit REALLY gets on my nerves.
So I don't know about this one.  Give it a view and tell me what you think: 



Our final category might be the best!  And by best I of course mean the worst!  That's right! It's time for:

The Batshittery:

If you follow me on Twitter, you already know that I absolutely LOVED Lifetime's version of that completely bonkers, incest-filled mess, Flowers in the Attic!  Well The Baby Jesus has answered all of our prayers and the kooks over at Lifetime are making the sequel, Petals on the Wind!  Here is the first trailer to this insanity:  



Heather Graham is back!  And she's brought her crazy eyes!  Hooray! 
Petals on the Wind will premiere on Lifetime Monday, May 26th at 9 pm.  Just want to make sure you've got all the information.  If it's anything like the first one, you won't want to miss it!  And come hell or high water, I will be live-tweeting the shit out of it!  So follow me on Twitter @girlsleuth and we can snark like the best of friends!
P.S. Please, please, PLEASE check out the Petals on the Wind photo gallery on Lifetime's website in which Heather Graham gives you so very much crazy, 70s chic fierceness!
Here is a mere morsel:

 
Well, I feel like we got a lot done today, y'all.  Do you feel sufficiently caught up?  I know I do!  But, as you know, there's new Books-Into-Movies dirt to dish almost everyday.  So check back here soon!  

Now I'll turn it over to you guys.  Hit me up in the comments section and tell me which movies you're most excited to see!  

EvilEva's Trailer Park Dissects Divergent And Shows Veronica Mars Some LoVe

March 14th!  It's so close I can practically taste it.  And it tastes like... marshmallows!  I'm, of course, talking about the Veronica Mars movie! 
After what feels like forever, V and the gang are FINALLY headed for the big screen!!!  And if Veronica and Logan cute-ing up the cover of Entertainment Weekly wasn't enough for you, I've got even more scoop to keep your inner fangirl sqeeeing and swooning!

First of all, you can now check out the first 2 minutes of the movie!!!  Yeah!  Like, right now!  While you're just sitting around in your jammies!  In the privacy of your own home!  Go ahead!  DO IT!  I'll wait. 



Wasn't that awesome!?!  I know it's basically just a rehash of everything we already know, but who cares?!?!  It's the first moments of the movie, y'all!  It's our first moments back in Neptune since 2007!  That's 7 friggin' Veronica-less years!  We have SOOOOOO much to catch up on!  
And if that wasn't enough, check this:

 

 

It's the cover art of the first Veronica Mars book!  It's called The Thousand Dollar Tan Line and it's written by show creator, Rob Thomas and Jennifer Graham.  You can add this little bit of sass and mystery to your bookshelf March 25th for the somewhat low price of $15.95.

And that's not even all, y'all!  There's also talk of a Veronica Mars spinoff series coming to the CW Seed!  Rob Thomas will be at the helm of the project but so far no word on who will star in it.  I'm hoping for a Piz and Wallace buddy comedy!  Which, if you know me at all, has been my dream since the show went off the air.  But I'd be totally cool with a Mac spinoff too!  Either way, I'll definitely keep you posted.

So speaking of things being close, March 21st isn't that far off either.  But I find it tastes less like marshmallows and more like Dauntless chocolate cake!  ;)
Nice segue, huh?  As if you didn't already know, the movie version of Divergent will be headed to a theater near you March 21st.  And since I was in bloggy exile for quite some time, I completely shirked my duties of posting and reviewing the trailer.  Well, there's no time like the present, right?  
So, here is the official trailer for the Divergent movie. You know, in case you've also been in bloggy exile for the past few months (or just living under a rock.)


   

Ok, now let's discuss the shizz outta this!

Check out the factions, y'all. Look at all those colors! It's like a Benetton ad from the 80s!  Well except for the fact that Benetton would never have their colors all divided like that.  They were all about the unity, people!   

Um, excuse me but your faction is Abnegation. You definitely should tone it down with that makeup, girl.  I mean, how did you even apply that mascara? You can only look in a mirror four months out of the year.

Ok, I've never seen Jai Courtney in anything before but he looks sufficiently douchey enough to pull off Eric's supreme doucheyness.   

Time for simulations!  P.S. your bun is amazing!

Yay!  Maggie Q!  I'm beyond stoked that Nikita is gonna play Tori!

Soooo you wanna be Dauntless, huh?  Well alls ya got to do is jump off this here roof into that there dark hole with no knowledge of what could be down there.  Could be snakes.  Or maybe spiders.  Or maybe nothing.  Hell, maybe it's an endless hole.  Maybe you'll just keep falling forever and ever.
Or maybe there's a net and a hot guy with a number for a name.

Well, hello, Four.  "Welcome to Dauntless," indeed.

And as an introduction to your new faction, here are some knives thrown at your face.   

Ah, the ferris wheel!  I don't know about you, but this is one of the scenes that I'm looking forward to the most.  So don't fuck it up, Summit.

Uh oh.  Things are about to get bad.  REALLY bad.  Like, Dauntless-under-a-simulation bad.  So hide yo transfers, hide yo Dauntless-born cuz they shootin' everybody out here.  

I'm excited for the train jump too!  Weeeeeeee!!!

Oooh, swoony times!  I don't recall things getting quite so steamy in the book though.  But who cares!  You know we're always all for shirtlessness here at Nancy Drew Is My Homegirl headquarters.  

And then there's that bitch Jeanine.  Although in this screen grab, I'm more interested in the guy on the left.  He looks a little like Woody the coroner from Psych, does he not?  Although Woody would NEVER join Jeanine.  He would probably be a part of Amity and enjoy some silly times on that magical bread they've got!  :)       

This scene better not get fucked up either.  In fact, you know, this whole movie is basically just made up of scenes that better not get fucked up.  I guess we'll have to wait and see how Tris and Co. fare. 

But if the 21st feels too far away to you and you want your Divergent now Daddy!, well just check out this week's issue of Entertainment Weekly, Veruca.

And if you're looking for some Divergent swag so you can attend the movie premiere in true fangirl style, Hot Topic's got ya covered.  You can show off your faction devotion with this t-shirt.  Or be a little more subtle with this Dauntless symbol necklace or these faction pins.  Or go more of the badass route with these temporary tattoos.

And after the movie, if you wanna be all weird with your book love, you can get your very own Divergent Barbie dolls.  You can get Tris (whose skin tone is described as "nostalgic") or Four (whose shirt you can remove in order to marvel at his back tattoos. Cos that isn't weird at all.) and reenact your favorite scenes!  (Cos that's also not weird at all.)

Well, that's all the news for now.  Now I'll turn it over to you guys.  Hit me up in the comments section and tell me the exact amount of excited you are for both of these movies!  Which Neptunian are you the most psyched to see again?  What scene in Divergent are you most looking forward to?  Have you already got your premiere day outfits picked out?  And what do you really think of those dolls?  (Gotta admit, they kinda creep me out.)

Welp, gotta jet.  There's a Divergent T that's calling my name.  ;)     

Kisses, marshmallows!

          

Behold: The Newest Catching Fire Trailer

Welcome back to the trailer park, y'all. It's been awhile but, boy, have we got some shizz to discuss now. Because the newest trailer for the second installment of The Hunger Games franchise, Catching Fire recently premiered at Comic Con and everyone is fa-reaking out!!!
And now you can too!

If you haven't already, by all means, peep the trailer:



Now, let's discuss the shizz outta this thing!

Ok, so, for the most part the first half of this trailer is just rehash from the previous Catching Fire trailer. Don't try to fool us, Lionsgate. We're not stupid. We have seen this shizz before. The little old man being killed. Gale getting whipped. Prez Snow and Plutarch with the talky-talk business. The riots. The Mockingjay signage. This is old news. We don't care for your rehash. Be gone with your day-old bread-like trailer bits!
The fact is I was all prepared to lose my damn mind over some newness, and you're trying to give me the same trailer as before just in a different order?!? I should call shenanigans.
But! BUT!!!
Then there's the second half of the trailer!
There's the Quarter Quell! And Finnick! And the other victors! And Finnick! And the island! And Finnick!!! AND OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!

Ahem. Sorry about that.
Ok, you've won me back over, Lionsgate. I'm officially re-psyched for this movie!
November 22nd can't come soon enough! For me at least.
But what about you? What did you guys think of the trailer? Are you glad we FINALLY get to see some of the other victors? Or were you hoping the trailer would be a little more Finnick-y? Were you longing to get a better look at the new arena?
Or did you think this new trailer was perfect and you're too busy hyperventilating to find the correct keys on your keyboard to type a coherent comment?
Umkay. Well, whenever you get your wits about you, be sure to drop me a comment and tell me EVERYTHING on your mind.

Divergent & Veronica Mars Lookie-Loos! Plus A Visit To Middle Earth & Wonderland!

Hola my lil' bloggermuffins! i know, it's been awhile since i posted anything. That's my bad. i've been supes busy and i unfortunately haven't had a lot of time to blog (Or read. Boo, you whore!) And it seems in my Internetal absence A LOT of Books-Into-Movies/TV news has been a-swirlin'! But fear not, for i have Favorited it all and now i will Cut & Paste the shizz out of it here for your enjoyment!
So let's play a game of catch-up, shall we?

Not too long ago, I shared the first look pic of the Divergent movie. Well now there are even more pics to squee/swoon/have sads over!
Behold Tris' first moments at the Dauntless compound: 

  

And here's our first for reals look at Theo James as Four:

So? What do you guys think? Do these stills (from EW, obvs.) make you excited to see the Divergent universe come to life? Or are you still grumbling over certain casting decisions?

While we're on the topic of first looks, get ready to lose ya damn mind... it's the very first sneak peek at the Veronica Mars movie!!!!!!
*loses damn mind* 
V. Mars herself, Miss Kristen Bell tweeted a pic of her first day on set!

(Is that a Veronica Mars Trapper Keeper!?!?! I want a Veronica Mars Trapper Keeper!!!!)
And if that wasn't exciting enough, a whole slew of Neptune's finest have been confirmed for parts and/or cameos in the movie! Here's the video-graphic proof from Enrico Colantoni (aka Keith Mars,) Percy Daggs III (aka Wallace Fennel,) Chris Lowell (aka Piz,) Francis Capra (aka Weevil,) Daran Norris (aka Cliff McCormack,) and Ryan Hansen (aka Dick Casablancas.)
And word around the girls bathroom is that these peeps are also a go for the movie version (just no video confirmation.):
Tina Majorino will reprise her role as Mac. (Yay!) Krysten Ritter will be back as Gia Goodman. Brandon Hillock will once again don his mustache and uniform as Deputy Sacks. Amanda Noret is back for her role as total bitchface Madison Sinclair. And Jonathan Chesner is on board as Corny.
Plus there are a lot of "rumored" appearances from the likes of Parker, Leo, Troy, and one of my personal faves Vinnie Van Lowe!
So get psyched, Marshmallows!!!

In amazeballs news for LotR fans, the trailer for the sequel to The Hobbit, The Desolation  of Smaug, was recently unleashed on the fandom. i haven't seen the first movie yet but this one looks pretty awesome.



Like i said, the trailer looks awesome. What some people might take away from it is: "hey, it's Legolas!" or maybe "ooh, cool dragon!"
My very first thought, however, was: "wait. wait a second. is that? is that... Lee Pace?!?!?"

And imdb was all like "yeah, girl. he's playing Thranduil." And then i totally lost my shit!
i'll end this post with a new fall show that i'm already super excited about! It's a kinda sorta spin-off of ABC's Once Upon A Time, which i don't watch but my mom is totally obsessed with. It's called Wonderland and centers around the character Alice, obviously. It looks really cool and the graphics look pretty phenom. Check it out: 



It's set for Thursdays this fall which could conflict with my Vampire Diaries habit. But there's always online watching. Or hell, maybe this will be the year that this homegirl finally gets a damn DVR and all her TV obsessions will be a simple record button away. (Like in olden times when i had a VCR!)  

That's all i've got for you now. So now it's your turn. Head downtown to the comments section and deliver all your rants and raves!

Dystopian Books-Into-Movies News That Is A Go And A No (Plus Find Out Who Will Play Augustus Waters!)

There's been quite a bit of Books-Into news floating about the Internets while I've been M.I.Bloggy.A lately. But I'm back, bloggerbabies! So let's get right to this business!  

Well, ladies and gentlemen, it seems our Ricky-centric (ok, ok MY Ricky-centric) freak out may have been for naught. What I mean is, the Delirium pilot was not picked up by Fox. Which, if I'm being honest, I'm kinda happy about because now I won't have to witness that toolbox Ricky from Secret Life playing my sweet Alex. On the other hand, I'm a little bummed because this project could have been really awesome what with Emma Roberts (my homegirl!) attached to it. But, alas, it was not meant to be.
Although, if you were really looking forward to the project and have a dogged determination AND a Twitter account, you can search Twitter for peeps lobbying to get the show up picked up by another network and join in the crusade.

Cursed with a similar fate, The Selection won't be making it's way to the CW either. If you remember, a pilot had already been filmed once and was passed over. It then got a complete redo with a completely different cast. But, this pilot, once again, wasn't picked up.
I guess maybe networks are scared that dystopians have been doing so well that they're bound to be on their way out pretty soon much like the witches of the 90s and the vampires of the 00s. Maybe their lifespan just seems better suited for movie trilogies.

A show that totally IS happening is The Originals! The spinoff of the CW's The Vampire Diaries is set to premiere this fall! You can check out the back-door pilot (and totally squeal over that part where Klaus leaves a message for Caroline!) here. (But it's only for a limited time so hurry and watch, k?)

Now, here's the big movie news of the week, kiddos. The One Who Would Be Augustus Waters has finally been revealed! And the part goes to......
Ansel Elgort!
I thought the name sounded kind of familiar and then it dawned on me why. He's the actor that will play Caleb Prior in the film adaptation of Divergent. So he'll be in two really big Books-Into -Movies. One in which he'll play Shailene Woodley's brother and the other he'll be playing her lover. That's..... weird. But congrats, Ansel (even though this is starting to get into some V.C. Andrews type of weird territory.)

Speaking of Divergent, a while back Entertainment Weekly gave us a first look at the movie. 
Behold the knife-throwing scene:

I'm still totally NOT into Shailene Woodley playing Tris but this is a pretty cool still to share right out of the gate. So, well played, EW.

And in even MORE Divergent news, the title and the cover art for Veronica Roth's third and final book in this series was recently released! It will be called Allegiant and will hit stores October 22nd. And I'm too friggin' excited! Like, Jessica Spano on caffeine pills excited!

I'll end this post with two new trailers. The first is the international trailer for The Mortal Instruments. This one seems a little more in-depth than previous trailers, plus it includes a sneak peek at baddie Valentine!
City of Bones will be in theaters August 23rd.



The other trailer is for Judy Blume's Tiger Eyes. Surprisingly, this is the first of Judy's many books to ever be turned into a movie. I've never read this one but based on the trailer, it looks pretty emo. It's all death-talk and pill-popping and crying-jags, hospitals, the desert, and what I'm just assuming is a dead father story.  
It stars Willa Holland from Arrow and, unless my eyes are deceiving me, the Pink Power Ranger. Huh.
Anyway, you can catch Tiger Eyes in theaters starting June 7th.



Well guys, I think we are sufficiently caught up with our Books-Into news. But, as you well know, new shizz is being reported EVERYDAY.
So I'll try to stay super vigilant with the latest.
Now I'll turn it over to your rants, raves, comments, and concerns. Leave 'em in the section below.

Divergent Movie News Plus TV News That Is Both Bookish And Not

As the title of this post suggests, i've got some Divergent casting news for ya, as well as a little Books-Into-TV news, AND i've also got some regular ol' non-bookish TV news to spill! So let's get started!

*i'll kick things off with what i'm fairly certain is the very last of the Divergent casting news.
Mekhi Phifer (who my mind REFUSES to see as anything other than this permanent mental image:

i don't even know why. In fact, i don't even think i've actually seen ALL of 8 mile. Apparently the mere trailer left a lasting impression on me as far as Mekhi Phifer's appearance is concerned. It's like i can't NOT imagine Mekhi without these hideous dreads. Even though he's been in a shit ton of stuff since 8 mile, and minus the dreads. So, i guess thanks a lot, 8 mile, for ruining Mekhi Phifer for me FOREVER) Anyhoo, what was i talking about? Oh yes, Mekhi Phifer will play the role of Max in the Divergent movie. Although, hopefully he won't be bringing those dreads and that puff jacket along for the Dauntless train ride.
The parentals of the Prior family have also been cast. Ashley Judd has nabbed the role of Tris' mom, while Tony Goldwyn will play Tris' dad. i don't mind Tony Goldwyn as he was a total kickass dad in The Last House on the Left. But Ashley Judd? Eh. She's not my fave for the role. Or for anything really. i'm not a huge Ashley Judd fan. Although i'm not a huge Shailene Woodley fan either. So... 
Oh Lord! Please don't let me hate this movie!

*Now for some Maze Runner movie news!
You know, i kinda thought The Maze Runner was a fairly popular series, but it seems like not that many people are keeping up with the movie news of it all. i keep coming across excited posts about the prospect of Delirium on the small screen and Divergent on the big screen, but i haven't really seen many peeps blogging about The Maze Runner film adaptation. Hmm. Well, if you're totally into the idea of James Dashner's dystopic vision coming to life, this news is for you! 
Thomas, the main character in the book, has finally been cast. The role goes to Dylan O'Brien, whom i've never heard of but am told plays on MTV's Teen Wolf. The role of Teresa, sole gal in the maze, will be played by Kaya Scodelario, another that i've never heard of but am told plays on the UK version of Skins. 
On a side note: i've gotta read this damn book! 

*Let's leave the silver screen behind and dive into some TV news that is truly awesome! 
Ok, so you remember how ABC totally unjustly canceled Don't Trust The B In Apartment 23 even though it was super hilarious and waaaaaay better than at least 4 of the comedies that are in their current lineup? Well, starting May 17th you'll be able to watch the unaired final 8 episodes of The B on ABC.com, iTunes, and Hulu! Yay! i've so missed Chloe, June, and, of course, James van der Beek! Which is kinda weird because i couldn't stand him as Dawson because, well: 

But as "James van der Beek" on Don't Trust the B, he's actually really brilliantly self deprecating. And i totally heart anyone that can make fun of themselves! So buck up, Dawson! You're gonna be alright!

*i'll end this post with the trailer for the pilot episode for the CW's Vampire Diaries spinoff, The Originals! 

    

*sqeeees over the sheer Klausiness of it all* 
Is it just me or has the Original family kinda become your new fave characters on TVD? i mean, i always liked Elijah, and Klaus's bad boy behavior has had me squealing and swooning for some time now, but lately Rebekah has started tugging at my ol' heartstrings with her desperate desire to be human and loved. Bless her little unbeating heart.  
So, obvs, i'm super excited for The Originals!
The pilot (which doubles as the first episode of The Originals and the 20th episode of The Vampire Diaries) airs this Thursday at 8 pm!
The only thing i'm bummed about is that with the Originals headed for New Orleans, there will be relatively no time for any Klaroline. :*(
i guess i'll just have to watch and see and find out how much of my love for Klaus is directly proportionate to his shippiness with Caroline and how much is just flat-out Klaus-luv. 

Ok guys, now it's your turn. Tell me what you think about all this new news.
Are you cool with Mom & Pop Prior? 
On the edge of your seat for some Originals Gone Wild? 
And how does Mekhi Phifer appear in your mind's eye?
Get your fingers at the ready and dish the shizz in the comments section.     

Let's Discuss The Shizz Outta The Catching Fire Teaser Trailer

Nerds of the world rejoice! The teaser trailer for Catching Fire is FINALLY all up in the internet's business!
i'm sure you've already watched and rewatched it like a hundred times. (Don't feel bad. i've done it too!)
So let's get down to brass tacks, as they say, and discuss the ever-loving shizz outta this thing!

First, if you haven't already partaken (um, what have you been waiting for?!?!) by all means, partake your brains out:





Usually when discussing a trailer i realize i might come off a bit, um, what's the word, ah yes, snarky. i really can't help it though. Turns out, i'm a snobby reader. Yes, apparently i think i'm totes hot shit because i read the book before seeing the movie. And being such a hot shit, i feel entitled to snark it up when it comes to viewing Books-Into-Movies trailers because, more often than not, i can use the phrase "that's not how it happened in the book" while feeling vaguely superior to non-readers that are looking at me like "huh? what do you mean? who's Madge?" 
Anyhoo, i usually like to do a minute-by-minute analysis of why, based solely on the trailer, said movie is probably destined to not live up to its bookish potential.
Howevs, methinks i might have to eat my snark this time around. i mean, what's there to make fun of? Only a heartless troll would find anything funny or snappy to say about the dude from District 11 getting straight-up murdered, or Gale being publicly whipped, or Plutarch and Snow calmly discussing how Katniss needs to be dealt with (ie by KILLING HER!)  

So there will be no snarky minute-by-minute for Catching Fire. Because, basically, in the opinion of this Tribute, the trailer is pretty awesome. 
The only thing missing? i think you know what i mean.
The freakin' Quarter Quell!!!
Throughout the whole trailer, there's really no mention of it. Except for that end bit with President Snow where he simply alludes to it.
But where is the arena?
And where are the newbs? Where's Johanna? Mags? Beetee? Wiress? And for the love of Buttercup, WHERE IS FINNICK?!?!? 
i mean, i get that this is merely the teaser trailer, but at least give us a little something new, Lionsgate! i mean, any little bread crumb will do. 

Ok, now i'll turn it over to you guys. What did you think of the trailer? Did you like it? Did it leave you a little disappointed? Were you really hoping for some new, Catching Fire specific stuff? Or did you really just wanna make sure that they didn't fuck it up with the casting of Finnick? 
Whatever your rant or rave, drop me a comment and tell me what ya think! 

Oh, and just a P.S., Catching Fire will be in theaters November 22nd. (And so will Evil Eva!)     

EvilEva's Trailer Park Rolls Out The Red Carpet For YA Books Into Movies

Welcome once again to EvilEva's Trailer Park!
i know it's been awhile since i've posted but Thursday was Thanksgiving and then i got into a verbal smackdown on Black Friday and well, then my suddenly sodium-enriched body made my hands entirely too puffy to type soooo... here we are. 
i hope y'all had a thankstastic Thanksgiving! i also hope you kicked serious ass on Black Friday in order to get your greedy little mitts on a copy of season 3 of The Vampire Diaries (i did!)

Today we're all about YA Books Into Movies here at the trailer park.
You may have already seen some of these trailers on other blogs or maybe you're like me and slightly addicted to YouTube. If neither of these is the case then check this shizz out right now and just look at what you've been missing.

We'll start with the highly anticipated Twilight replacement. And by that i mean the trailer for Stephenie Meyer's other book about peeps with fucked up eyes. And by that i mean the trailer for The Host.
     


So. That's happening. i don't know, y'all. Am i too jaded? Has the Harry Potter franchise ruined my faith in all other Book Into Movie endeavors? i mean, it seems like i just can't get all that whipped up about the idea of books being made into movies anymore. In fact, it kinda makes me cringe just thinking about it. i think my wariness has to do with the fact that if a movie is bad (a la Twilight) that shizz can seriously affect my impression of the book. Like if i ever decide to reread the Twilight series, i'll have to prep myself before hand. Because instead of focusing on the great book that i really liked and, in fact, recommended to friends, i'll be constantly picturing this instead:

Did i leave the oven on?

i don't know about y'all, but i REALLY don't wanna envision Kristen Stewart's Patented Awkward Face every time i wanna reread a book that i actually liked once upon a time.
Anyhoo, as usual, it seems i've gone off on a bit of a tangent. Let's return to the topic at hand: The Host trailer. i'm not really sure how i feel about this one. i don't remember all that much from the book because it's been a looooooong while since i read it. What i DO remember is that it was very desert-y and i was kind of squinked out at the end when they put that alien dealy thingamajig in a Shirley Temple-esque body. Or something like that. Am i remembering that part wrong?
POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT FOR NON-READERS but to all that have read The Host i pose this question to you:
Isn't the whole deal that there are basically two chicks holed up in one melon? And don't they find a way to extract the alien part? And then don't they find like a body for the alien to live in because one of the cave dwellers like, falls in love with it? And the body that they pick that they think would go perfectly with the alien's personality or whatever is some kind of childlike body? Am i totally remembering this book all wrong? At the still tender age of 30 is my memory already turning to shit? UGH! Would those in the know PLEASE, PLEASE comment. We MUST solve this mystery! 
Anyhoozle, the only thing that i actually had something legit to say about in this trailer happened at the 2:05 mark. At which this very Ringer split screen happened:       


Wait. Am i Siobhan or Bridget?

i'm still not sure if i'll brave the theaters (and the theater prices) to see this one. But if you want to, The Host will be released March 29th.

Next we have the trailer for Warm Bodies which is based on the book by the same name written by Isaac Marion. i haven't read this one yet so i don't really know what it's about other than it appears to be a zombie love story. Which sounds pretty gross but based on the trailer (which, let's face it, could mean less than NOTHING as far as the book is concerned) it looks like it could be pretty good and maybe even a little funny. In fact, my only problem with this one is that i feel like after watching the trailer i've basically already seen the whole movie. That's a lot of shizz in 2 minutes and 32 seconds. See what you think. Check out the trailer and definitely tell me your opinion if you've already read the book.

Warm Bodies will be coming to a theater near you February 1st.

The next one is a YA biggie. It's the first official trailer for the adaptation of Cassandra Clare's series The Mortal Instruments. Check it: 



Like i said before, i think this is gonna be the big YA Book Into Movie of the year. The Mortal Instruments has a very intense and rabid fanbase, some of whom i believe refer to themselves as "Mundies." Much like the Twihards, i'm sure the Mundies will be out in full force come August 23rd when City of Bones will be released. i might actually shell out the dough to see this one. Although probably not. My town has a dollar theater so i'll probably just wait until it comes out at that one.
However, even though the movie looks pretty good, i'm still a little gun-shy as far a Miss Lily Collins is concerned. For, you see, i made the mistake of watching Mirror, Mirror. That movie was one steaming hot pile of doo doo with absolutely NO redeeming qualities. 
In all fairness though there doesn't appear to be anything "snow white" about this movie. There are demons and tattoos and swords and badassery. Plus Lily's new hair color totally masks the hugeness and Peter Gallagher-esque quality of her eyebrows! So i'll be more focused on the movie and less focused on the recurring thought "does this chick even own tweezers?"   

Now for the Beautiful Creatures trailer. i don't know about this one, y'all. i didn't really like the book and the trailer doesn't really do that much for me either. There are just some love stories that just make your lady business wanna roll its eyes. (You know if it HAD eyes.) i feel like this is one of those love stories. Personally my lady business isn't impressed with this trailer at all. (Is that too much info?) See what your Georgia O'Keeffe thinks: 



Well? Whaddidyathink? Is it just me or does it seem kinda Twilight-y? That's pretty much the kiss of death for me. Although Lena does seem a little more badass than Bella. i mean, she's shattering glass on her classmates, she's magically tatted up. And if Ethan steps outta line she'll just give him a good old fashioned open hand slap to the mouth:

Bella would never dream of smacking the sparkles off Edward. So, advantage: Lena. Although there IS a disadvantage column, and in it is the fact that the guy that plays Ethan isn't anywhere near as hot as Robert Pattinson. Plus i'm confused as to why Ethan is dressed like he just stepped out of Pleasantville? Beautiful Creatures is set in modern times, no?
Hmm. i just don't know if i'm feeling this movie. My lady business is at a firm hellllll no! But my brain isn't so sure.
The debate will continue until February 13th when Beautiful Creatures hits theaters.

Ok, now that we've all watched the trailers together, i'm dying to know what you guys think. Hit me with your rants and raves in the comments section below.

EvilEva's Trailer Park Classes It Up With Classic Books Into Movies

Welcome back to the Trailer Park, y'all. i don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of literary classics are headed to the big screen.
So in the effort to class up this joint, i present to you some snooty-tootie trailers for books-into-movies that scare the pants off of me. Not because they're horror, mind you, just because they're long and complicated and very Tolstoy-y. 

See, this is my problem with "the classics." Even though i'm a nerd that loves to read, i'm actually kinda stupid and these "classics" confuse the hell out of me. To this day even hearing the words "Great Expectations," makes me want to punch someone in the face and then burst into tears. Weird but true. That book has been the bane of my bookish existence and my book kryptonite since the 10th grade.
Anyhoo, that's why i generally stay away from the classics, because they bring on bouts of facepunchery and tears.
The movie industry, however, does not care for my tale of woe and instead is hell bent on introducing me to this Pip kid along with his equally stuffy and hard-to-understand friends Count Vronsky, Sal Paradise, and Jean Valjean.
Now let me just admit that even though i'm a book nerd and all that, i haven't actually read any of these books. The closest i've come is Cliffs Notes on Great Expectations. (P.S. Thanks, Cliff! You cheating lil' bastard.)
And while we're being truthful with one another, i might as well admit that i have also never seen any movies/plays/miniseries/masterpiece theaters based on any of these books either. i'm just shame-faced all around. 
So since i don't really have any clue (or many clues, rather) what these books are actually about, i'll just write what i think based on what i've gathered from the trailers. Ready? Here we go.  

We'll start with the trailer for Anna Karenina.
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
First off Anna Karenina is an extremely hard name to write and say. It's kinda like banana. There are just way too many n's and a's. i mean, how many na's are in this thing?
Anyhoozie, the story goes something like this (more or less): A fiercely and fancy-dressed Keira Knightley marries Jude Law who seems kinda sanctimonious about her affair with an unfortunately blond and hideously mustachioed Aaron Johnson (who has something very Colonel Mustard about him going on) considering Jude's own affair with that British nanny. (This fact may be from his real life and have no basis in this movie.)
Anyway, apparently everyone is all Team Jude and they think poor Keira is a total slut. Other than gossip about Keira Knightley, the townsfolk also enjoy ice skating, horse races, dance parties, and long rides on the Hogwarts Express! Then poor Keira gets knocked up, Jude Law gets even more sanctimonious and Colonel Mustard goes crazy. And someone probably dies. i mean, the trailer didn't really show that but let's face it, affairs in movies NEVER end well. i just hope poor Keira Knightley doesn't own a bunny.

Now let's move on to the Les Miserables trailer:
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
Hmm, this one is a bit of a toughie. The trailer doesn't really give me many details to go on but here's what i gleaned from this minute and 37 seconds.
Things are evidently gonna get musical up in this piece as Anne Hathaway warbles her way through that song Susan Boyle sang on Britain's Got Talent lo those many years ago when people thought that only attractive people had the ability to sing and were totally shocked that Susan was actually *gasp* good. i mean, really, had those people never heard of Clay Aiken before?
Anyhoo, back to Les Miz--- Hugh Jackman is in it and he looks really rough and somewhat Jude Law-ish. i really thought he was Jude Law when i first saw him. But no, it's Hugh Jackman and a months growth of facial hair. 
There are also poor people. Lots and lots of poor people. Poor people in the streets! In the woods! In a factory! On boats! Hooray for poor people!
Ok somewhere between looking like Jude Law and poor people, Hugh Jackman has managed to find a razor. Oh thank God! That was a close one.
Russell Crowe is also in this movie. He looks like a total jerk. Which isn't very surprising because he kinda looks like a jerk in every movie he's in. But unlike every other person in this movie, he doesn't look poor. So... good for him?
Anyway, Amanda Seyfried is in this movie too.  i don't know if her breasts can still tell when it's raining or if she's still carrying on her affair with Aaron Echols but she kinda looks like the poor mans Princess Buttercup in this flick. It's unclear whether she's an actual princess or maybe  just some hippie.
When Anne Hathaway isn't singing, she's chopping off all of her hair which we're supposed to think it looks chic short. We're also supposed to think Anne can sing. 
This is obviously gonna be some huge, sweeping epic although even after viewing the trailer i still don't know what this movie is about. Except poor people. Perhaps i need to read the book first before viewing this one.       

It's time to watch the trailer for On the Road:
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
This seems like a total hipster movie. i mean, having not read the book and based solely on the trailer i can imagine many a hipster douche walking around with a tattered copy of On the Road in their back pocket. It seems tailor made for those intellectual phonies that like to brag about how their favorite book of all time is Catcher in the Rye or War and Peace just because it makes them seem so fucking superior to you and me who, like a normal person, would admit that our favorite book of all time is Harry Potter. Because It's AWESOME. NOT because it makes us sound smart and sophisticated and too cool for school. Just because it's AWESOME. 
 Anywaysies, (which isn't an actual word but one i made up and like saying because it feels good so take that hipster douches that are sneering at my incorrect word usage.) it's the 40s or 50s or some other era, i don't know, i'm not good with cars. There are also typewriters and jazz if that helps.  Some dude in a flannel shirt decides to take a road trip with some other dude in a white T and for some reason they decide to take sadsack Kristen Stewart with them. Ugh, last person i would wanna take on a road trip EVER.
Anyway, in my estimation this movie is basically the dude-bro version of Crossroads. Although i don't know if there will be a karaoke battle in this movie. Probably not. i don't think guys do that. And even though K Stew played Joan Jett in The Runaways, i don't think she could totally nail I Love Rock n Roll for gas money like Brit-Brit can.           

And finally the trailer i dread the most, Great Expectations:
Here's The Trailer:



Here's My Take:
Ok so truthfully here's what i immediately thought while watching this trailer:
Great Expectations. Starring:

That's all my Harry Potter soaked brain could see upon viewing this trailer for the first time. After i realized that this wasn't actually a Harry Potter film (even though it stars about half of the cast of any given HP movie AND was directed by the director of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire) i figured i should probably give it a second watch. So upon my second viewing of the trailer, here's what i think Great Expectations is actually about:

So there's this kid, Pip, and he somehow gets tangled up with some old cray crone named Miss Havisham who seems a little too involved in the love lives of children. Especially since one of said children is her adopted daughter, Bitchy Ginger. And, of course, Pip falls in love with Bitchy Ginger because men (even at a young age) are fairly stupid and love them some bitches.  

So Pip grows up and becomes friends with Hagrid and apparently he gets rich because of some mystery benefactor (which is something i hope to have one day as that sounds like the best thing EVER.) But even though Pip is loaded and has access to dragons and griffins and shit, all he really wants is the sweet, sweet lovin' of Bitchy Ginger. 

But, unfortch for Pip, Bitchy Ginger seems to have grown bitchier with age and so she waltzes with some other dude that's not Pip right in front of actual Pip's face. Pip's pissed. 

Then Lord Voldemort shows up and there's a ship and Pip whines about Bitchy Ginger some more and Bellatrix LaHavisham's dress catches on fire. But i guess LaHavisham doesn't die because she brags about how she totally fucked up Bitchy Ginger's emotions. And then Pip whines some more about his unrequited love for Bitchy Ginger. And after writing the word "ginger" so many times, it makes me wish that there was a Weasley in this story somewhere but, alas, there is not.   

So that's my take on things. What do you guys think? Have you read any of these books? Was i even remotely close with my assessments? (Let's be honest: probably not.)

Will you see any of these movies while you're really just anxiously waiting for Catching Fire to come out? Sound off in the comments and tell me what ya think.